A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:This past year was a tough year. My wife, ex-wife and I had a big argument in july. This was around the time I felt like I needed counselling because I was carrying too much stress on me and it was affecting my marriage. I got to the point of not focusing on what was the most important thing in my life, my wife. She tried so hard to reach out to me and loved me more than anything. In july I went to stay with a friend to give us space and go to counseelling to show her i wanted to fix what we had. In August she suddenly told me she didnt feel the same, wasnt sure that I would not change and she put her all into it. My world just collapsed. However I went through counselling which has helped amazingly, I had found the answers to get through my issues. My exwife and I still spend time together but it can be tough. One day she says we'll never be together, another day she gets emotional and cries when I say or do something wonderful for her even if it is the smallest thing. Lately, last few weeks we have spent a lot of time together, making dinner for one another, watching movies, etc etc. I watch myself to not get hopes up, but i do still love her and hope things would work. Sometimes she even calls me for no reason. One flaw, she had confided with a guy from her work a few months back, but she says they are just friends. They do hang out, or did, but I try to give her benefit of the doubt and hope she didnt go to him on emotional support. At this time I do not know what to do...it is like she cares but doesnt want me. And i mean care as in more than simply caring..lol
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female
reader, RaeMay  +, writes (29 April 2009):
 well as a women i can say that when theres a relationship break its really hard for both people. now you both were married making it even harder. she probably does care about you and wants to be friends with you but she probably doesnt want to be with you. and when you say that you do nice things for her and she cries, thats probably because she cares about you and she knows you want the relationship but she doesnt wanna hurt you by saying she doesnt want anything to happen. of course all women think differently. maybe she just needs to take a long break and think about things first. maybe she still does love you. you just have to either talk to her about it or wait and see what happens.
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