A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: hi, i need advice on whether a guy i like feels the same. we've been sleeping together sporadically for 4 years (cos i was at uni) then i didnt see him for a while and he got back in touch about 6 months ago. i'd never seen him as boyfriend material before but this time i felt really differently. but when i suggested getting together properly he said he wanted to wait til he got back from a holiday, but then when he did get back he wasn't as keen as i'd have liked and i ended it for my own sanity. he seemed pretty upset when i ended it, but i couldn't keep away and have seen him since. he says he likes me and its lovely when we're together, the way he touches me feels like he cares but he always blows me out and doesnt get back to me and stuff, which makes me feel he doesnt care. he's had a very hard upbringing which he says makes it hard for him to show feelings but i need to know if he feels the same. i'm pretty sure he doesn't but i don't know what to do as he's the first person i slept with after losing my virginity by being raped so he holds a special place in my heart. Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (10 September 2008):
Well his upbringing may have been nasty but his dad isn't there preventing him from returning phone calls.
He can change if he wants and if he's blowing you out and behaving badly then his upbringing is just a bad excuse.
Don't let him get away with things just because he took your REAL virginity. He was your first sex partner in reality - bastard attackers don't get that right. He will always be special but if he's going to cause you pain in the long run then wouldn't you rather keep him as a good experience?
Tell him that you won't go out with him if he continues to act like this. He can get his act together or lose you.
Good Luck!! xx
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