A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i'm 28 yrs, i've dated a guy for 3yrs my problem is that i dont trust as he used to lie before cheated on me but i couldn't let go cause i had no proof of that only signs,at that i was not working he used to treat me so bad i used to see him only once or twice in a month and he wouldn't even help to just buy a R12 airtime.Now he's in trouble and he want me to help him finacially as i'm working.so i just want should i help him, the thing is that he did that as he was transporting another new lady even though their not involved as i've got a proof but i just want to know does he love cause it took a 1 and half years to introduce me to his parents does he truelly love or he just want to use me.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2008): Vow, it is a difficult situation; obvioulsly after all this time you have feelings for him;
BUT
I suggest you have to take "Stock"; when you needed his help and support, he was not there offering it;
NOW he needs help; I think you have to take care of YOU; he cannot expect you to help and support him;
It sounds as if there are more problems to the relationship and I think you should really think about it very carefully;
what are you getting from this relationship; are you happy; is this how you want to live for the rest of your life; or why waste more time with this guy if there is no real future; after 3 years, you should know him well enough to know if you can share your life with him;
I suggest you do not support him; let him sort out his ow problems; don't allow this guy to USE you;
Take some time and look at the situation and if need be; MOVE ON; love is not enough to make a relationship work; it might be difficult now; but the longer you delay this; the more difficult it gets;
Best wishes and lots of SMILES.
A
male
reader, spartautopio  +, writes (17 July 2008):
It sounds like he is using you. Think about it, he wouldn't help you financially yet he wants to take some of your money. Who seriously takes that long to introduce you to their parents. I think you need to get out of that situation. Why did he lie to you, if he loved and trusted you he shouldn't have had to right? You deserve better, someone who is willing to try and make it work. A relationship takes commitment from both people. It sounds like you are really stressing yourself over this whole thing. Hope you find happiness!
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