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female
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anonymous
writes: I was seeing a guy for a month and a guy I had been texting for 6 months finally wanted to meet me - I had seen one of his friends casually for a time, so that complicated things and he wanted to be cautious. When he found out I had a boyfriend he still wanted to be friends, but one day he got mad and stopped visiting for 3 weeks. He then started texting again and when I asked him why he was mad, it seemed he was jealous. I broke up with my man, the new guy visits and stays over the whole weekend, but never invites me to his home or out with his friends. He has told his friends we are hanging out, but since our argument when they ring he says he is "not doing much." He also said he wants to wait to sleep together until he knows me beter, but he lets me go down on him, although he hasn't returned the favour. Overall his company is good but he usually makes the decisions about what we are going to do and as I am always a good host he seems to have it made. He compliments me frequently and asks me if I'm okay and can be quite affectionate, but he said he is cautious about getting into a relationship. I don't know whether to just let him go as I'm thinking that if he really liked me it would be different and I don't want to be a fool, but then wonder if I should give him time. I also wonder whether he thinks we couldn't be together because I dated one of his friends.
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female
reader, Toria +, writes (25 September 2006):
 You need to talk to him and tell him how you are feeling and that you need to know what he wants from you and where this with you two is going, you also need to ask him why he doesn't admit on the phone to his mates that he is there with you, why he won't let you out with him when he is out with his mates as it sounds like since you two had that arguement you are now being kept a secret.
Basically he is getting what he wants from this relationship and you are just doing what he wants hoping this it will sort itself out but all the time you let him carry on this way he will see no need to be any different.
Good luck :o)
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