A
female
age
,
*epper126
writes: Valentine's Day was the worse. A long story but basically my boyfriend and I had a communiction problem with having our gifts brought out by personel or we would give them to eachother ourselves. I thought since we both work in the same department we could do it ourselves but I think he wanted them to be delivered on the floor?? I'm still confused. Anyways after 2 years he doesn't tell me that he loves me. He gave me a card that says,"I wish I could find new ways to tell you what is always in my heart. I love you." Then he signs it,"To my special friend,Pepper." "Love, C*****." Does he love me or does he love me as a friend?
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2008): Why stay with him?
xx
A
female
reader, Pepper126 +, writes (17 February 2008):
Pepper126 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionUpdating the situation. Sex is not happening. Only once this year. He says that when we argue that does something to him and he looses the feeling. We do not argue that much and mostly when we do it's because of something mean or insulting that he says. And too we are going to church now every Sunday and have been all year so far. That may have something to do with it which I can respect that. True that. Yesturday we were talking and he said that he had gotten to the age where he wanted sex to mean something. He wanted it to be meaninful and that he took that serious. Sex starts outside of the bedroom and he had thought it would have been special for us to sleep together on Valentine's Day but we had an argument over something stupid. That ruined his whole day. Well it ruined mine too but I still would have made an attempt to work past it but he wouldn't.
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2008): The question that you have just asked us then why dont you ask him? Easy, we dont know this bloke of yours or how he reacts. Just go out for a drink or a relaxing situation and ask him outright what the hell is going on.
take care
xx
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A
male
reader, Dazzerg +, writes (17 February 2008):
I'm guessing that what threw you was signing it to a 'special friend'. It's hard to tell on what there is here because some people do consider their partner also their closest friend and the message he put in the card is warm enough to me. To me the phrase 'special friend' lends itself to the conclusion that he is expressing his warmth for you in a particular way not so much that is all he sees you as but without more detail I maybe wrong.
How is your sex life? Does he still act in a way that tells you his passions for you extend beyond a friendly love?? He may not tell you he loves you for other reasons than a loss of passion; it may simply be that he feels he doesnt have to say it anymore because you are in that 'safe zone'. If that is the case then it may simply be a case of needing to put the flame back into a relationship which has become routine. It seems that way from how he wrote in the card where he seems to feel that his old ways of expressing affection to you have become routine in his eyes and he is struggling to find new ones. I wouldnt worry unless there is something else causing you concern; good luck :).
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