A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:There's this guy that I really like in my music class. He's really shy and he's never had a girlfriend but he is possibly the nicest person I have ever met. I asked him once if he wanted to go out somewhere a few months ago and he politely said that he doesn't have time right now because of his band and his play, which I took as a rejection, because that's what it was.Yesterday we had sat down to listen to one group perform. I'd already heard it but he hadn't, and he came and sat next to me. He asked if he could hold my violin and I let him, but then he asked me if i would should him some stuff on it, so we both went through into a practice room. He chose the room, and could have chosen the one with all of his friends in it, but he chose a completely empty one. I have anxiety, and this made me incredibly nervous, and I was trying not to shake and I don't think he noticed. I showed him how to hold the violin which resulted in a lot of face touching because he didn't have his chin in the right place, and a lot of hand touching while I showed him how to hold the bow and stuff. We were alone for about ten minutes before someone else came in, and I left as soon as I could because I was really shaky. He asked my friend what was wrong with me because I'd left so quickly and looked so upset but she didn't know so she didn't tell him. It's really upset me because he knows that I like him. I find it hard to be in "intimate" situations with him like that, (not that they happen often), like being alone in a room or being close to him because I know that he doesn't want to go out with me or anything, and it makes me blush and anxious and I hate it. This has really confused me because he has never, ever shown an interest in my instrument before, let alone allow me to touch his face etc while I show him how to play it. I don't know what's going on. Was he just being nice?
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female
reader, Rachael99  +, writes (16 November 2013):
He did take you some where alone but it might of been because he wanted to have privacy when he was just learning how to play your instrument. He might not of wanted people staring at him. You were upset because you were nervous and he thought you was mad at him maybe. it was nice of him to ask your friend but I'm surprised she didnt know why if shes supposed to be a friend of yours.
Yeah I think he doesnt want to go out with you but he does sound like he wants to be friends. what instrument does he play? can you ask him to show you or is it a wind instrument (that would be a bad idea, lol you dont want to swap spit)
A
male
reader, 11muds11  +, writes (15 November 2013):
If he takes you into a room to be together with you, with lots of touching he might have "noticed" you now. It happens a lot to boys and it's very normal.The fact that you left quickly actually, without you meaningly doing it, actually really helps you. He really notices you now so don't worry about rushing off so quickly.I would simply write him a note telling him that you hoped you helped him and t was fun and that you were just a little uncomfortable being alone in a room without knowing him well. That will give him the info that he needs to get together to know you better and to make you feel comfortable.But please be careful and control this relationship. Boys can go from good boy to bad boy pretty quickly if they think they can take advantage of your crush on them. So stay in control and only do things your comfortable with. If you can't, then give it some time till you feel like you can. Sorry if that sounds a little preachy but I'm a bit older and I was a boy once. LOL.Good luck. I hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (15 November 2013):
 Don't read into anything, yes as much as we would love this little display to be what we want. You have asked him out and he politely declined. He needs to do lot more than touching your music instrument , like ask you out.
Its just not worth setting yourself up and he then does not ask you out. So going forward try to be calm and cool around him, let him be the one to reach out to you.
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