A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hello i have a question, i have been dating this guy for 3 months but am confused about his character.The first time met him, he told he was born Jan 30th, the next time i asked he said 20th feb 1979 i asked to see his Id it was 1th Jan 1978. Last time he told me his sons birthday was in April, when i asked again he told me August. His company had a job vacancy for a receptiontist, i asked how much was the salary he told me 800 dollars, when i checked the advertisment on internet it was 500 dollars. I mean he could have said he doesnt know. The strange thing is he remembers things i tell him, but forgets what he tells me. When i met him his son was 6 years old last week he said 5 years old.When i asked how many years he has been in his company he first said 6 later said 9. I even asked what is his phones name, he could tell the brand ,but did not know the model unbelivable. He told me wants us to have a serious but slow relationship. I asked him how long do we know each other, he replied i dont count this things.My question is does he have a disorder or his just a liar.
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female
reader, femmenoir  +, writes (21 May 2018):
 This guy is a compulsive liar and yes, he does know exactly what he's doing, even though he may not realise the severity of his actions.
It doesn't sound as though he respects himself enough to tell the truth, so how can he remotely respect you?
He is in way too deep here and he may have been like this most of his life, so to think you'll be able to "change" or "help" him, i doubt very much.
Lying usually starts in childhood and if he's now an adult and is still lying to such an extent, he won't change.
If you choose to stay, you'll be spending your time with somebody who doesn't even really know what telling the truth means and doesn't really care about any consequences of lying.
He cannot register, because he doesn't know any different.
You should leave this relationship before you get in any deeper.
I'm sure you'd regret staying, if you were naive enough to do so.
A
female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (20 May 2018):
 This guy definitely sounds like he has issues, and either way; he isn't for you to fix. My advice is that you do a Matrix move and dodge this bullet because this looks like a situation that you should not get yourself into. Honestly.
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A
male
reader, Garbo  +, writes (19 May 2018):
 He could be both — compulsive and habitual liar. Compulsives lie out of anxiety that the true answer would somehow screw up the situation for someone involved it it, and that could turn into habitual because it relieves his anxiety. Lies are hard to remember so it’s easy to catch this.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2018): Your description depicts a pathological liar. It's not memory-loss, it's a compulsion to state falsehoods. The compulsion to lie unnecessarily IS a mental-disorder!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (19 May 2018):
 I agree with CodeWarrior's advice
He is either a liar (and even lying about things that isn't important s- a HABITUAL liar) or he has mental issues (or BOTH). And either way, that is NOT something you want to get into. There will be no trust from your end as you will feel you HAVE to verify everything he tells you because he does seem to just lie about everything and anything.
If I were you I'd back away NOW before you get too involved.
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