A
female
age
41-50,
*oni1983
writes:my boyfriend and i are having issues with sex. I want sex alot but he says that he hates it to often as it gets borin! Im gettin frustrated as im always the 1 givin oral and bring in toys etc to spice things up but i get hardly any input on his part. We are only havin sex once a wk at the most!! I no he watches alot of porn and am wonderin if this is affectin our sexual relationship as he finds normal sex borin so isnt feelin satisfied enough to do it more often...
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male
reader, twinlab99  +, writes (20 June 2010):
 YOu're giving oral, and he's getting bored??? ohhhhh man I'm stumped.. :( yah it's the porn, I'm all for porn, but it can be destructive at a certain point..... watch porn with him, see if that does anything for him....
Also, can he get it up easily? could be erection issue...
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (20 June 2010):
 Yeah I think you're right, guys who watch a LOT of porn can become addicted. The way you describe it I'm sure you're right about the porn. And you wouldn't have mentioned it unless you knew that was why. The slope starts exactly like you're describing, becoming bored with normal sex, being selfish in bed/basically using you to masturbate with, blaming you for the problem, then eventually the sex tapers off to zero. You should try to put a stop to this before it gets totally out of control. It sounds like you're doing everything you can and then some to make it not "boring." If he refuses to admit he has a problem with porn, then you may have to call off the relationship. I don't think it's that he doesn't care about you, but porn truly is addicting.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (20 June 2010):
 I think Chippy 2 has hit the nail on the head. Non-kinky sex can get boring so if you just like 'normal' sex but a LOT of it yoiu may need to move on down the road. Good Luck!
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A
female
reader, Chippy2 +, writes (20 June 2010):
I agree with the other answer. I was in a relationship that I gave and gave and the guy was into internet porn and I even offered to do ALL that with him. But he just couldnt let himself get close for REAL. Only was satisfied with the internet. It took me 4 years and it damaged my self-esteem terribly.
Please re-consider this relationship. Sex is an important part and you are very young - and if he thinks it is boring and WILL not try to make it work - it is not going to get better.
Some people have a lower sex drive, some have issues, some have both, but if it doesnt fit you - then you CAN'T make it what you want with him. Takes two to work on it.
Good Luck
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (20 June 2010):
He seems to take more than he gives. After the effort you've put in, I think you need to look at this relationship as a whole and see how much effort he's really putting in. It sounds to me like he's not all that bothered about this relationship.
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