A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am in love with a guy that i have know for years. We are not bf and gf but we have had sex on many occasions. He was my first (as in i lost my virginity to him) and he has been my first for many things. (First guy to cook me dinner, first guy i went to the cinema with, first guy i slept with, first guy to get me pregnant) Yup, thats right. The first time we had sex i fell pregnant. I never told him and had an abortion. That was 2 years ago and i only told him recently. His expression was heart breaking but i felt he had to know. Even after this, i feel so safe with him. I went to stay with him last tuesday, wednesday and thursday in his uni and we didn't do anything amazing, just cinema, shopping, watching TV, dinner at his etc but i didnt want to leave. I feel lost on my own without him near and i cant stop thinking about him. The problem now is, i think im pregnant again! I took a test and it said im not but i might have taken it too early. My period aint due till the end of this month so it is too early to know for sure but im scared. I dont wanna talk to him about it coz i dont wanna worry him in case it is nothing. I promised him that if i fell pregnant again i would tell him but im scared. I wanna be with him but now im afraid that me might be pregnant will ruin it. I havent told him how i feel but i dnt know if he feels the same or if he is using me for sex. Please help me. I am so confused!
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abortion, be pregnant, his ex, lost my virginity, might be pregnant, period Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice, but i am scared to ask him how he feels in case he rejects me and i find out im pregnant. Should i wait to see if i am or not and if i am, ask him before i tell him im pregnant or tell him i think i might be, how do you fel about me or what? im so confused nd scared because i love him too much to risk losing him.Wat can i do???????
A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (17 April 2009):
 You need to ask him if he considers you to be his girlfriend. If he says he doesn't want to "put labels on what you have" or "lets just be friends" it's all about the sex and he couldn't care less.
If he says "of course I do you silly thing and gives you a big hug and kiss" everything is fine and he is your boyfriend.
If he won't commit to you why not? Also who else has he had unprotected sex with, go get an STI screen just in case.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2009): It's probably safe to say he feels something. Don't panic. Your best choice is to maintain the status qou and don't mention you might be pregnant until you have a positive test result. Just lay low and continue to see him. If you do happen to be pregnant, tell him and see if he steps up. Then you'll have answer. Also- after your period starts, or you have a positive pregancy test it wouldn't hurt to tell him how you feel. Don't get all crazy talking about marriage and "I've loved you from the start" blah blah blah. Just say, you would like the two of you to be exclusive. You're young, and you have lots and lots of time. No need to rush, panic or otherwise do anything rash. Good luck.
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