A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:yesterday my boyfriend messages me to call him "call me i wanna talk to you" ..he did not have a balance in his phone and was just back from work. he has a shitty life full of financial struggle,hard work and always a negative bal. in his account. we are on a LDR we have been together for the past 2 and a half years..and as for my memory goes i don't think this is the 1st time he's doing this.i saw that message after about 10 min of receiving it , and called him up. he didn't pick the first two times then he did..i just casually asked him sup?why didn't you pick (he always asks me when i don't so ..so did i)he said hmm just like that ..and he sounded really sad...i asked him what happened..and was being very nice and sweet...i asked why do you sound so sad honey..his reply "just like that...hmm :(" me:what hapnd tell me...him:nothing..notthiing happened.. me: did you have dinner? him:no..just walking . me:walking home? him:yeah.. and he sounded so down i didn't know what to say...and when i asked him to listen to the rain.through the phone at my place, he said i'm in a bad mood ..lets talk tomorrow.and then i prodded him some more..no use. so finally we ended the call.later while texting he sent this "will you please stop cribbin abt it...i thought i'l feel better talkin to you....but you are just like. please.just let me alone for some time" !!!!!i WASN'T cribbin bout anything...we didn't even speak much...:'( what did i do?he expected me to cheer him up and i couldn't..i really want him to be happy i also told him that... i said i wasn't cribbing but was just being concerned about him . he replied "please don be..." :( what does he want?..then he sent "i know i am bit rude..i'm sorry..but i guess little lone time will help me"...i said ok you have ur lone time..but dont tel me not to be concerned i love you..bla bla take care.i said il pray to god that whatever his trouble might be..get over soon and he sent "thank you" after that i did not feel like replying to himi feel confused and baffled..should i text him today..?i'm scared to do so...i've observed that if i don't let him alone he just..becomes worse. when i keep shut and listen to him , he comes crawling backbut i feel rest less and guilty, that i didn't help him out..i feel like crying .is it because of me that he's upset by any chance?what is best to do...?does he expect me to care for him or not? he never wants to share with me..sometimes he does,on his own. but if i myself ask him he doesn't.he really does love me,and everything was going great.i don't get it.please help me.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2012): maybe he just needs some space.
Just be understanding and calmly talk to him, he may just open up to you automatically when talking normally rather than asking him whats wrong constantly.
Maybe text him back re-assuring him that you will give him some space and when he is ready to talk you will be there to listen
hope this helps
x
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