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Do you think his behavior is unfair to me?

Tagged as: Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 July 2010) 3 Answers - (Newest, 9 July 2010)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Hello Guys,

Idk where to start. Ive been having relationship for 11months.. and the begining of this relationship everything was perfect..5 months ago, my bf went to his country for his sick granddad and stayed there 2 weeks and this situation really affected him andwhen he came back, he got into depression like 2months..I was patient and waited him. didnt even see him for 2 months.. then everything went back to normal and hang out..etc.. during those time either he got sick or throw up cause of beer...and always send me message I got sick I feel so bad..then his granddad came over here and had a stroke now I havent seen him for 3 weeks and again he got into depression...

I really dont know what to do.. I dont even share my problems with him cause I lived here 3 months by myself and he didint even take care of me because he was in depression... do you think is it fair him to behave me and tell me all the problems, and not to see me?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Tim,

yeah I shouldnt have suffer from what he is going around in his life. but on the other hand if he is my bf ofcourse I will support him but how long will it take? I wanna see him like every girl wants to see their bf.. but I cant make it big deal because I dont have right to want him to see me especially in tough times.. but I had his tough times several times. Iam also humanbeing.dont I deserve to be happy? last time I texted to him about myspace cause his myspace always make me unhappy and he deleted last week.cause hee wanted me to make happy... and I dont know what to say... I just told him about ganddad you should accept it... I know its hard but he should think of others like me.. I dont know AM i being selfish? its his 2nd time to get into depression.. and at the end of this month he will have surgery... Why am I always be patient or be unhappy? either he is sick or will have surgery or dealing with his granddad...

Idk how to act...

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A male reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (9 July 2010):

olderthandirt agony auntsounds like a broken relationship tha cant be fixed

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A male reader, TimmD United States +, writes (9 July 2010):

TimmD agony auntNo, it's not fair. It sounds like he has legitimate reasons to act the way he is, but that doesn't matter... you have needs. (and I don't just mean physical) You have emotional needs, and there are hardships in your life as well. Nobody can control what happened to his granddad, but it's not your fault and you shouldn't have to suffer as well.

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