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Do I text my brother's best friend who has a girlfriend?

Tagged as: Crushes, Friends, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 August 2015) 3 Answers - (Newest, 10 August 2015)
A female United Kingdom age 22-25, anonymous writes:

Dear Cupid,

Oh god. So bascially my brother who is 3 years older then me has this really cute friend. A couple of months back I developed a crush on this friend and i used to think he liked me too. But then he got a girlfriend and I haven't seen him in ages so my feelings are confused, I have his number so I could text him but he might feel creeped out. Who do I do?

Love confused xx

View related questions: best friend, crush, has a girlfriend, text

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2015):

No!!! Absolutely, not!

You must respect the fact that he has a girlfriend. Think about what you would want your boyfriend to do in a similar situation. Would you want him to accept the messages?

Why would you text him, if you only have a crush? Are you presuming his girlfriend's feelings about her boyfriend are less important than yours? Why would you text a guy who already has a girlfriend? If he was your boyfriend, would you like girls with crushes texting him?

Some girlfriends don't mind ripping the hair out your skull for messing with their boyfriend. Go ahead, try your luck!

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A female reader, Ciar Canada +, writes (10 August 2015):

Ciar agony auntLike Honeypie said, having a crush is normal, but to start out as a relationship wrecker at such a young age...that will be a very difficult label to get rid of.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (9 August 2015):

Honeypie agony auntNope, you leave him be.

Having a crush is fine, they happen. BUT ... HE has a GF.

How you feel of you had a BF and some girl started to text him because she has a crush on him? Bet you wouldn't like that... That's not cool.

So don't BE that girl.

And the thing with crushes.... JUST because you have a crush on him, doesn't mean he feels the same way about you. Nor is it requited to "confess" your every crush.

So no, accept that you have a crush. And that a crush is akin to a fantasy. Fantasies are fine to have, but they CAN and in many cases should... remain private.

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