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female
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anonymous
writes: Seeing him or giving up?I was dating a guy for 7 months and he played on and off at the beginning, after this Feb. we had a committed relationship after I told him I was going to see someone else since I did not feel this could work out, but I knew he was not ready for that even he claimed he loves me stuff. I broke up with him three times after he committed, since he many times prefers partying than seeing me at weekend time, it was really hurtful. I told him several times, but it changed for a short while but then changed back finally. I ended up breaking with him at a saturday's morning when he did not pick up my phone at 3am but turned off his phone when he partied at some club, he called me back at 6am when he got back, I texted him to break up and explained him on the phone since this relationship was really destorying me horribly. I wanted an offical talk to him but he just played around and we never really made a final offical break-up talk but I thought we did on the phone.We didn't see each other for about 2 weeks, but still email or text msg every few days. He called me and wanted to see you like crazy yesterday, seriously wanted to talk to me and seriously wanted me to meet his parents who got here to attend his graduation ceremony. He called me almost 10 times yesterday and invited me for dinner, coffee, desserts, playing golf etc with his parents, I eventually went for desserts and lunch with his parents. We ended up having sex again last night when he sent me back, his friend was still waiting outside of my house, he just could not control himself and crazily wanted it-I still love him so much so we made it-Now I do not know how to deal with this relationship. I feel I have stronger feelings than he has for me, I can not resist him every time seeing him, but we are not compatible at all, he has a very difficult personality. Also, we are going to work in different cities after graduation in 2 weeks, we will seperate. How could I deal with this? What does that mean he wants me to meet his parents from Germany? I am from Asia, taking someone back home to meet parents is kind of serious thing. But I knew that is a typical thing in western countries, people do not take it seriously but he claimed european families took this seriously at least his family does. So what? I do not know our future even I am sure I love him but I do not know whether he loves me since he repeatly hurted my feelings so badly in the past, also I can not trust a party guy who did not pick up his gf's call at 3am but called back at 7am.What I should do?
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female
reader, Mary Ann +, writes (15 May 2006):
 You aren’t in a dilemma because you already know the answer to your question , I have been in the same situation and even though you know what is the right thing to do, you don’t want to do it , because part of you still hopes that there is a perfectly explanation for his attitude.
I don’t think that you deserved a guy that only when he thinks he is losing you start treating you like a loving BF should. When he accepted a commitment you said that he claimed , that means that you aren’t sure about his feeling, when someone loves you , you feel the love of that person he doesn’t even need to said the exact words because you feel it , in the way he looks at you , the way he kiss you, take care of you, and how the most important thing for him is that you are happy.
I think that you should read you question carefully and think of how you feel. Don’t ever think that you can leave him, that is better having a bad relationship that being alone.
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