A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I'm in a committed relationship with a woman who is a bit more "experienced" than me, although neither of us is very experienced. Early on in our relationship, when the subject of past sexual expereinces came up, she seemed honest. She had had relationships that were mainly one night stands or friends with benefits kinda things. SO she was never really comfortable with them. As such, she told me things that made me feel special...that I was the first man to make her orgasm. That I was the first guy she went on real dates with and took trips with. That I was the only guy to live with her. That I was the only guy who came inside her. That she collected adult toys, but had never used many of them (she worked in an adult gift store briefly). In particular, she had restraints on her bed she said she never used.Well, I believed all that, and felt rather special about a lot of it. Very funny thing happened yesterday...I ran into her ex. It was actually kinda arranged by her, but I guess she thought we wouldnt really talk...but we did.After a few beers alone with this guy, he started dooing a lot of talking. To make a long story short, she was very sexually active with him, used the restraints and all kinds of toys, went to Europe with him for 2 weeks and lived with him for a while. Worst, and I forget how this came up, but he gave her multiple orgasms and they had unprotected sex, so I'm imagining he came in her because she's on the pill. I know he didn't make any of this up, because I was not leading with any of it. He also mentioned other guys that she had sex with that she never mentioned to me. I know of them, but she told me she only made out with them.So now I'm left feeling cheated. Like all that talk was whitewash to make me love her more or make me feel special. I feel used, ordinary and like I'm one of many now.I haven't said anything to her, but I don't feel the same toward her at all.Do I say anything? Dump her?
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friend with benefits, her ex, one night stand, orgasm, the pill, unprotected sex Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2010): wooooo hang on this x is going to say he gave her multiple orgasms of course he is , and sing the praises of their unique relationship.
Somebody is telling porkies but maybe this was to make you feel special!
What if she said this x gave her multiple orgasms and why havnt you, etc you would not feel to good.
Porkies white lies are not always bad...motive.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2010): Dump her. It's one thing if she was honest about all this stuff. Believe me, it's hard enough to deal with learning that your everything was just a common one nighter or party leftovers to so many other guys - when she is honest about it. I know that all too well. But when she lies about is all...how are you gonna build a future when you start with so much deceit.
It's hard enough, though possible and maybe worth it, to build a life with a honest slut. I don't know how or why anyone would want to with one who lies to you from day one...
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