Do I make him chose me? or his girlfriend?

A female age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Heres the story. He is my best friend but he has a gf that he has been dating since April 2007. We met in November of 2008. March of 2009 we were best friends and by June 2009 I was deffinately in love with him. We had always been close and he used to stay up and talk to me till 3 a.m. (yeah, like 5 hours a night of talkin to him!) We could talk about anything and everything. At one point we both had strong feelings for eachother and he'd talk to me all the time and he'd even sneak out to see me at my rodeos or come shoppin with me. We grew really close really fast and he was always there for me when I needed him. The problem was that He was with his girl and even though she is hateful, rude, stuck up person he wouldn't leave her even though i made him really happy and he made me really happy. He was also 22 when i fell for him and I was a young 15 almost 16. We had a few fights but he never argued with me just let me blow up at him and when I came around again he would make me feel really special and we'd end up best friends again. We stayed really close untill December 2009 when I met and began dating my ex (we'll call him joe). His gf knew joe and went to school with him and she told him horrible stuff about joe and he became very distant and kept trying to tell me I needed to leave joe that joe was very bad and very bad for me. I didnt listen though and I dated him for a month and a half. When me and joe broke up though my best friend was no longer there for me. We hardly talked anymore since me and joe had gotten together cause joe told him off when he found a love letter I had written to him (My best friend). After that I went to work at a high pace job where i was working rediculous amounts of hours and could never make it out to our weekly hang out spot. Once things settled down though me and him never really made it back to the way we were before but I told him that I still love him and that I always will. It didnt seem to help. Finnally October 2010, almost 2 years after we had met I told him that I meant it when I said that I love him and that I would give anything to see him happy. He told me that he was going to stay with his gf and that he couldnt throw 3 1/2 years away. I told him i understood and that I'd never say anything about it again but a few weeks ago I went to our tuesday night hang out spot and he saw me with my best girl friend. He kept pulling me away from her and showing me videos of him shooting guns or ridding motorcycles and even put his arm around me and tried pulling me away from my friends all cute like we were dating telling me "come on lets go inside." He kept hanging close to me all night and I saw that old flame in his eye again. I was in love all over again. not long after he sent me a message saying he misses me and needed one of my hugs. Still the next time I saw him he looked uninterested in me because he was surrounded by our friends. Now my best girl saw him a few nights ago with his gf of 4 years and said he looked so miserable with her and that when she was kissing all over him that it was written all over his face that he doesnt love her. The thing is I dont want to be a home wrecker but I want to be with him and I dont want to hurt anymore from loving him so much. What do I do? What do I tell him next time he says he misses me and needs one of my hugs? Do I make him choose me or her?

View related questions: best friend, broke up, kissing, my ex

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