A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Over 2 years back I fell for an older married friend. He offered a shoulder to cry on through hard times and I got closer to him. He gave me all the signals he was interested too. But then pulled back. Not being able to handle this well I moved away. We kept in touch but not regularly. I never told him how I felt, until I few days ago in an email. But I didn't get anything back. Not even I cared for you too. I'm dying to find out how he felt for me, if anything. He still gives me complements, but doesn't seem interested in a friendship. I text and email him, to which he replies but doesn't really answers any questions or asks me any. He lost a parent recently and I felt guilty that he has no one to talk to. Do I let him know that I'm here for him??
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2007): Look, he's married. its hard that he lost a parent recently, but the person who should be there for him and he should be getting support from and talking to, is HIS WIFE.
If you REALLY want to support him, tell him you realize his first priority must be his marriage! But, I bet you are not willing to do that, right? Or are you? Can you set aside what YOU want for what is the honorable, sensible course of action?
There can be no future in continuing to call or send texts and emails, and he is aware of this. Which is why he won't respond to your questions.
Yes, he listened to you when you had problems. All well and good, and as the other poster says, he was probably flattered that you sought him out.
But now, let it go! What would you do if his wife were to call and ask what on earth are you doing emailing her husband?! Think about it!
A
female
reader, BEEN THERE DONE IT +, writes (26 February 2007):
 Hi babes,
He gave you a shoulder to cry on and to be honest he was probably very flattered that a young girl gave him compliments, he was probably flurting and enjoying it. He probably pulled back because he knew it was wrong and felt guilty...This was not fair on you as you started to get feelings for him, now you have told him how you feel he is probably confussed and not sure how to handle the whole situation... remember he is married are there any children?
Just be careful babe think of your own feelings first this may come back and bite you. Your young please be careful....
He has lost a parent and you said he has no one to talk to is this what he has told you? well he does have his wife so be careful I am not saying don't talk to him but he is not thinking of your feelings,
Good luck babes,
Let me know what comes of all this and remember be careful
xxxxx
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