A
female
age
22-25,
*ainyZurich
writes:So I have this best friend. Let's call her J. J is 18 years old, I'm 16. I have been in love with her for one year now and she knows it but... Yeah it's a year-long story.... More Information: I've known her since 2012. Since then we have been pretty good friends. Due to our big amount of shared hobbies, we spent a lot of time together (eg. at the red cross or at theatre practice). She is interested in both boys and girls but she thinks that she might be asexual as well because she feels disgusted by sex. Not kissing or hugging. She just doesn't like sex. I think that she has mixed feelings about me. She sees me as a little sister... And J had been in love with HER best friend for a long time when I told J. But then things happen like she holding my hand. Or deciding to sleep alone at my place. Or proposing to me in acting class. Or asking me to share a bed on our Munich-trip and then cuddling with me for the whole night. I wrote her a letter some time ago telling her the whole story from my point of view and expressing my feelings. And she answered with a really long letter too. And I can't get one quote from it out of my head "I care about you. I like you. But I don't love you... right now."People tell me, that she's playing with me, but she's my best friend and I love her. I can see that she's trying her best to deal with this situation so I can't be mad at her.Anyway, my question is: How bad of an idea would it be to just kiss her after our school's-out-party in summer, after which I never have to see her again because she is going to move to a different city for university?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (24 March 2015):
 What is your desired outcome of the kiss?
Why not just try to kiss her now and deal with it now?
It does sound very dramatic and might be a warm memory for you to do the surprise kiss thing when you know you never have to see her again. But what are you trying to prove? What are you trying to do? Make a memory or show her something or demonstrate some kind of brave action?
She responded to your letter that she cares about you and likes you and she doesn't love you. You can see that she's trying to deal with your feelings about her in a way that doesn't make you angry.... so again, what's the point of the kiss? It's a bit... well, aggressive toward a girl who has tried to let you know what her feelings are.
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