A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi ive been with my partner for over 3yrs we have been through alot together i was kicked out of home and moved straight in with him. together we have faced one abortion, 3 miss carriages we were living together for 2yrs then moved back to his parents then i moved out and he didn want to come. couple weeks later i moved back to live with him he seemed so eager he unpacked my stuff, now im moving out again but he doesn want to move out with me. he says that he would be unhappy, he also says he has stopped carrying bout me and that its just worth to much hard work he says im so negative but how am i suppose to be positive about the fact my partner doesn want to live with me. he says ive made him the way he is today.he says he is content so he wont break up with me. is this relationship over? do i have to change? how can i be more positive? please help
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female
reader, kaykay1989  +, writes (22 March 2011):
 I'm sorry to hear that you both have gone through so much misfortune with carrying children. Theres definately been a bit of back and forth but have you asked him why he has stop caring for you because thats the key question.
I wouldn't say you have to change its hard as theres nothing indicating why he's stopped caring. Do you think you've changed towards him? and if so in what way? Maybe thats what needs to change, but I would always say to friends as I would say to you, you are who you are. Don't change who you are because someone says so. For him to say he's staying with you because he's content is not a good enough reason what so ever.
It's never good to stay with someone because your content it means you won't be happy and that your staying in a relationship for the wrong reasons how can you be content when you don't care about someone doesn't make sense. You would only start resenting each other after a while thinking why did I stay in this relationship when im unhappy and I could of met someone else I am happy with.
If he can't commit to moving out with you then it's probably best that you both stop trying for a baby because this wouldn't be the right relationship for you both to bring baby into. If he can't commit to making the 1st move of moving out with you how can he commit to a baby?
I hope this helps and I wish you the best of luck! xxx
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