A
female
age
36-40,
*athleen
writes:How to choose between 2 guysI am currently in a similar position me and my ex fiancé were together for 5 years we would have been getting married this November then in may of this year he cheated on me with this woman close to his work he says it is because I was always in a bad mood and always fighting and it wasn’t jus me he did thing wrong too and admitted it he told me I needed a break from me for about a month but still denying that there is something between them and after about 3 weeks he admitted it but the whole time he is saying he don’t know what he wants and after about a month my friend introduced me to a guy she knew we went out for a date and he is actually the perfect guy all women wants he told me in the second week wee dated that he is in love with me and I am everything he ever wanted after about a month he told me he loves me I thought it was weird because how could one feel so much for someone in so short time but he is great he is romantic feels the same about everything I do he is very jealous and protective of me he does do the party thing where I like to go out once in a while on the other hand me and my ex have also a lot in common and we always have fun together he likes to go out with me and he is also jealous but not as much as the other and also I sometimes feel like he doesn’t care as much I’ve been with the new guy on and off for about 2 months now and he makes me happy but when I am alone I long for my ex and I ve now and the other way around can any one please help me with some way of deciding I don’t want to make the wrong choice you can [*Mod Note* Poster I removed your personal email]
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a break, cheated on me, fiance, jealous, my ex Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2010): To tell u he's in love wit u in the 2nd week of dating sounds wierd. Like there's a motive. The ex cheated. U miss the good times with him "he cheated" the good times have gone whether u like it or not. U sound like u have been given an ultimatum? Or ur on a last chance as ur gonna be alone forever.? Does ur ex want to get back?
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (15 September 2010):
 When in doubt, don't buy. That is a classic saying, and a good one too. When you are not sure about which man to be with, it is best to not be with any of them.
The one you will be happy with will leave you no doubts in your heart. So neither of these men are right for you at this time in your life. Stay single. Enjoy life. The right man will come along and then you wont have to ask anyone this question.
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A
female
reader, raiders  +, writes (15 September 2010):
 You need time and should not be with either one. Your ex is your ex and that's where he should stay in the past. Your new man has not entirely capture your heart therefore its time to move on. You don't have to settle, give yourself time you don't necessarily need a man at this time of confusion to be happy.
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A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (15 September 2010):
 An ex who cheated on you isn't worth your time. Let him stay in your past.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (15 September 2010):
 This is a choice only YOU can make.
Your ex cheated on you and then consequently blames you for his actions, doesn't seem like he really have a lot of respect for you or women in general. Just because you two were together for a long time doesn't mean you HAVE to stick with him.. OR the new guy.
Maybe you need to take some time and figure out who YOU are and WHAT you want in a partner.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2010): I think you should choose the new guy. Make a new start, your ex cheated! That should be enough to never want to see him again. I know you spent 5 years with him, but unfortunately he betrayed you and once the trust is broken, it can barely be fixed.
Never heard of once a cheat always a cheat? If he done such a thing before you was getting married because you was a little moody, he WILL do it again.
I think the new guy is a great fresh start and spending time with him WILL help you get over your ex. He seems really into you, why not give him a chance?
However, be careful with the whole over jealously thing, that's not always a good thing remember.
But get to know him more, you might REALLY, really like him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2010): i think you should choose ur second guy coz u can love someone but u cant teach someone to love u....u said tht second guy is romantic and he said that your everything he ever wanted...and the first one cheated you...so you should choose the second guy....this is just my advice dont decide it on anyone's advice....ask your heart whom do you love most the first guy or the second?
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