A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi guys. I've come here since I'm not sure where is really an appropriate venue for things.I've just come back from a great vacation at Disney World my husband bought me as a late birthday present.Yes, we could have gone on my birthday but he got it for me for May 2022.I'm a mom of two, got teenage daughters.It was a great vacation, we hadn't been for a long time.But this vacation had a nasty sting in the tail.Apparently my husband was caught having sex with a Disney cast member in the bathroom, this girl who apparently works at popular hot dog place Casey's Corner in the Magic Kingdom, a quick service restaurant.We'd placed our order via the My Disney Experience app, couldn't just queue up like years ago. I had to do this, online it said queueing up post-COVID isn't allowed.I hate doing everything via apps but I guess no food, no apps.I feel angry and humiliated, and want to sue this woman since we live in a state where alienation of affection laws are in play. North Carolina is where we live.My husband claims it was just sex and he'd also met her via a dating site and used a throwaway profile to message her for a meetup in Disney World.To think he used our vacation as cover for a meetup with this woman.She's a pretty young Latina and I feel frumpy and fat compared to her even though I'm not.Yes, he and this woman, literally caught with their pants down.Now, I'm worried about STD's. I could have caught them and not know.I want the best for my girls, even if we have to divorce.Then again, my husband's got no history of cheating before this incident.Is this a midlife crisis of some sort with a younger woman?I don't want to be put off Disney World due to this. But so much for it being The Magic Kingdom. More like Nightmare Kingdom after this.Wouldn't it be bad publicity / PR for them if this became public?I had told a friend about it who suggested I go to the media about the incident.What would be the advantages and disadvantages of going to the media about this, would it be a "PR disaster" for Disney or would it be a novelty bit of news in this era of COVID, school shootings and Ukraine?Our daughters want to go again when they can afford to do so but should I ever tell them that Dad cheated on Mom with a girl who works there?Isn't what the woman did a fireable offence from Disney World or something that brings them bad publicity?I haven't found anything on Google on this.I do love Disney stuff, still have a small collection of Goofy and Donald Duck merchandise. My daughters love Disney too, same sort of things as me.We were meant to go the 50s Prime Time Cafe since we'd never been but husband forgot all about this, so we had to settle for the ABC Commissary which was great. OK, so not like the expensive food the other side of the park, but good for what it was!!!! We intended to visit some of those restaurants but never did.None of us had ever been to the 50s Prime Time cafe before, is it good or as terrible as web reviews make out?I'm still angry at my husband and have tried to discuss it, but he's in a bad mood a lot since we've been, and I'm suspecting he's sexting this girl.We don't even live in the same state as her, yet I've seen he's used our family email to contact her and she seems interested in being stepmom to our daughters despite being what, 24-25 years old?Using our email for this? The hell.Doesn't help that I've seen photos of this woman in sweatpants sent via email with her midriff showing, and a rather off-color email which mentioned about "Bring a whip!". WTH is she doing??Obviously it wasn't just for sex he'd met her!!No way will I let her have my kids as stepmom!IDK how to deal with the stress of things, and feel like my husband's changed for the worse.We're supposed to be going on a Christmas minibreak to LA, it's booked and paid for, but cancelling it now or going through with it, what to do now?I really need advice. Angry AF. Don't know how to cope with the cheating and husband's constant bad moods.I feel like I can't get rid of this Disney World vacation from my head and it's memorable for all the wrong reasons.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2022): First I would suggest you figure out if you both feel like your marriage is worth saving and if you can forgive him. If not, I would assume you need to file for divorce being that there is nothing worth salvaging. If you do believe in trying to save your marriage and you can forgive him you will definitely need some outside help. He may resist but this will be necessary to figure out how to go about saving your marriage. I would also add that men and women have totally different views regarding sex. We are more physical with less emotion where women definitely are more into the emotional side then the raw sexual pleasure. Best of luck.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2022): Not to stereotype, your husband behaves like a low-life. These Latina women that works at Disney are desperate immigrants from their country that can't find a life or a future to have a sense of stability or hope. They are the ones with no values or no brains to succeed in their country. So they come here by legal and most, by illegal means and are put into jobs here for their survival and are willing to do anything to get a step up in life here, including sleeping with a married man from a happy home. They are what many of the well-off latin's there call, Cholos. Your husband hooked up with one, and if she is from Mexico, the well off people there call them Nakas. This may offend some, but it's a reality in loss values and no sense of. You seem to be a nice woman, that has being paying attention to what's going on here in our country and has little understanding of the World that is coming into the United States, and that is ok. What is not ok, is the low life values your husband put his family in with a similar low-life person he found at a park that is filled with kids, family, respect for decency but instead, he is a Chollo, like the Latina that is working there. He may change in time. I would forgive a cheater who is willing to be better, than a crazy stubborn person who refuses to improve in peace and joy contributing. Take care.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2022): You seem to forget that it is your husband who married you and promised to be faithful to you. He is the one who lied, planned and cheated to go with someone else not this other woman. He used her too. He uses you as a cleaner, for chores and to take care of his children. He used her for sex. Yet instead of getting annoyed at him and how he betrayed you you complain about the woman? Jesus!! For all you know he lied to her big time. He may well have told her he was single or you were separated and only on holiday for the kids or planning to leave you soon. Very few women would give sex to some guy they barely know just like that.
He must have spun her some sort of line to get her to do it.
Has it not occurred to you that women who work in those jobs get loads of guys hitting on them. She works in a menial badly paid job and some of these guys will pester her or offer her money for it. She isn't going to drop her knickers for any guy who fancies a freebie, especially if she knows he is married and got no intention of ending that marriage.
Why would this woman want to see your husband again - let alone marry him and take care of your kids. By the way if she took care of your kids that would be doing you a big favour, not you doing her a favour, and you could never stop them from marrying and setting this up if it suited them.
The truth is that men who are happy at home do not cheat.
Ok some have this mid life crisis thing but even then the smart wives make sure they iron it out together and do any experimenting or whatever it takes together, not him having to go elsewhere for it.
Unfortunately a lot of women get married and then get lazy and assume their hubby must keep to his vows of loyalty simply because they made a promise years ago. The guy has to want to to, he has to feel it is worth it for him, not just doing it to suit his wife. Some women become a housewife others a mother and forget all about being a girlfriend to the wife - then he is likely to stray. Most guys who want to stray don't have much about them personality or look wise so have no choice but to dream or pay a professional for it.
If they are lucky enough to find a woman who gives it to them free they are laughing all the way to the bank and it massages their huge ego.
You are a middle aged woman who has supposedly got a fair bit of experience of marriage, men and life yet you talk like a fifteen year old. Why?
As for the idea of you suing them, deary me, how pathetic.
For what? They cannot insist their staff don't have sex with customers. And it would all come back to your hubby as being the instigator anyway. He would look like the low life sleaze he is, and everyone would know it.
It would also cost you a bundle to take this further legally, hope you are rich.
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