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female
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anonymous
writes: erm.. where do i start? lol i have just found out that i have genital warts. when i asked my boyfriend of three years if he had slept with anyone else and caught this std he said no. it may sound niave but i really want to believe him. i spoke to a nurse on nhs24 who told me that certain people are 'carriers' and that may be how i've contracted this infection. is it possible for these warts to flare up 3 years after my boyfriend and i first slept together? should i split up with him? i remember when i first started going out with him someone told me that one of exs' had claimed she had got a disease from him. cant remember if it was this particular one. (keep in mind this person who told me this has big spite against my boyf and never wanted me to go out with him in the first place.)looking back over this question it seems pretty obvious what i should do but i think i really need to get some advice. i love my boyfriend very much which is why i'm just so confused about the whole situation. help!
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female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (12 May 2006):
 Genital warts are caused by something called HPV - human papilloma virus and some strains show up as warts. You can have it in your system for years unnoticed and, like herpes simplex (which is associated with cold sores) it can show up at times when your immune system is feeling a bit poorly like when you have a cold or feeling stressed etc. It is know that certain strains of HPV are associated with certain types of cancer - mainly cervical and anal - but don't panic because not everyone with HPV gets either of these conditions. HPV is very widespread in the general population, and there are various types so it is important you have a test to figure out if you have one of the high risk types or not. Anyway it is passed from skin to skin contact, and condoms will not protect against transmission of HPV. Only you can decide if you want to carry on with your relationship - there is no way of knowing this is evidence of cheating or not as he could have been carrying the virus for years (it even passes from mother to baby during labour in some cases!). What is important is that you both get some medical treatment for the warts and look after yourself.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2006): ive just more or less come out of that situation my self but with chlamydia. i know this is probly not what you want to here but i think your boyfriend may have been cheating on you as chlamydia is the only std that lies doorment in your body the only one most people dont know they have.he would of more then lightly knew he had somthing wrong and didnt have the disancy to tell you.dont that say somthing?.but its up to you at the end of the day...just be caful in the future used a condom.hope this helped.good luck.x
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A
female
reader, Clarey +, writes (12 May 2006):
 Some women wait years before finding a problem,which just shows up as an abnormal smear test. If he has warts there may be visible little lumps on his penis. Anyway, as a precaution you should ask him to get checked out because you don't want them passed back to you.
You don't always catch them straight off and they can take a long time to come out. He really must get checked. There is no reason to stop being with him. These things can be an embarrassing pain and they serve to remind us for caution with contraception and protection, but don't judge him to harshly.
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