A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:One of my best friends and I met 2 guys last year at a party and we started to go on group dates toghether. However her guy -X was always flirting with me and disrespecting me. I noticed she would grow quiet and look mad. I confessed to her That I Noticed her anger towards me regarding X 's flirtacious attiude toward me. I wanted to be a good friend and sensibly approach the issue with her privately- however she then told X everything I said . She told him that I said that I thought he liked me ( she twisted my words). That same weekend my guy stopped calling and appArently lost interest- which made me really upset bc I liked him very much. But my best friend and X became boyfriend and girlfriend- Since then she never wanted to hang out and she was always too busy for me and our other common friend. She became friends with all his friends and it was obvious she only wanted to spend time with her new crew. Behaviour such as ignoring texts and constantly declining invitations for her and I to hang out. Anyway! After a bad fight with her boyfriend X (he slapped her ) She recently admitted to me that she was pushing me away on purpose. We got toghether to talk things out and then she told me and our close friend that we only brought negative things into her life . A week later she called and admitted she was jealous of me and resentful toward me . Now, She has been insisting for 1 Week to talk to me and She is coming to see me today. My dilemma is ,1- I do not know of I can trust her again and 2- I have a feeling that she had some negative influence over the guy that dumped me. I kno he is an asshole regardless, but I can seem to shake that feeling. Am I mixing the 2 things up?? Any advice to shed light on this matter would be greatly appreciated!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2010): Yes your best friend did betray you over a guy, and you may want to forgive her, but will you ever trust her again?Dont get me wrong girls can make the mistake for falling for a guy and 'ditching' all their friends for them, but its not something you should forgive and forget straight away, because you dont want her thinking she can walk all over you, and think she can come and go from your life as she pleases.You could try asking the girl if she did have any negative influence for the guy that dumped you, but is he worth it, theres plently more men ot there, and we have to go through associating ourselves with the bad ones, to meet the good ones right. This guy doenst seem worth your hassle. And your friend, well she has a lot of making up to do..
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (5 August 2010):
 Your friend broke the 2 biggest rules...One being two-faced, and two ditching u for her bf and a new set of friends. Chicks before dicks!! As friends were not perfect but I usually give them the 3 strike rule then end the friendship. Now since her bf is gone and she's lost those friends, she's crawling back to u. Thats a very big option to weigh. Another thing is she did admit to being jealous and Im hoping she did apologize? Going to assume u guys have been friends for a long time. I would meet her, give her one last chance to reprieve herself remind her that she chose a guy over ur friendship, was being two-faced, and got jealous over something u couldnt control. Let her apologize and put this situation behind u. The friendship will be a lil rocky at first but thats expected within time it will go back to what it was. As for the guy that dumped u, I would look at it as she saved u from getting involved with a jerk and having ur time wasted. Even though thats not what her intentions are.
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