A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Did I ruin things by saying I love you? We've been seeing each other for four months. He has told me many times how he loves being with me, wants me to open up to him, and that he was falling in love with me. He told me "love ya" tonight, and I said I love you. He responded with "wow". I told him I wasn't expecting or asking for anything in return, just that I wanted him to know how I felt. I am afraid I may have scared him. Am I reading too much into his "wow" or do you think I ruined things with him. Should I just give him time to think about it? What's your opinion? Thank you all!!!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 August 2009): no i think its good you told him how you felt babe, theres this guy who tells me he loves me all the time and were not seeing each other and i think it'll bring you closer together :)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks so much for your response. I know I caught him off guard, and I believe that he loves me. He'll tell me when he's ready. I'm OK with that. We talked about it this morning, and he says no worries, he's not freaked out. But next time I'm feeling it, I'm holding my tongue and I'm taking your advice! :)
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A
male
reader, Anonymousmale1 +, writes (7 August 2009):
 It's not as bad as you think but you did catch him off guard. He wanted to say it but he wasn't sure the time was actually right. He'll think about it and more than likely come to the conclusion that it was coming anyway, you just beat him to the punch.
However, if he doesn't bring it up again let it go and wait for him to say it. Instead, I have a better word to utilize on these occassions, "Like", "I like you".
Sounds strange huh? But lets put it into perspective, ok? Men, when told "I love you" in the early stages of a relationship tend to have their whole lives flash before them. Yep! The whole thing, marriage, kids, mortgage, cars the works and all this overwhelms them because for whatever reason we like to ease into those things, kinda like a horse being broken in. Get the idea?
Now the word "like" can actually mean the same thing as love if you allow it to be and it's not as threatening to men as they settle into the relationship and it's kinda good in the females favor because after awhile he'll start to wonder if you love him or not (because you substituted the word like) and thats a good thing because to determine if you do, he'll be telling you all the time that he loves you just to hear you tell him you love him too. All because you changed a few letters in a word.
Now some may think that this is trickery, but it's really not. Let me explain why. Ask your friends, especially the ones that are married if they like their spouse?
They will all say, I love him. However, thats not what you mean. You can love someone and not really like them and when that happens the relationship is in trouble.
Now when you like someone, really like someone, they are your best friend. You do things together, you talk for hours on the phone, you miss one another when you are seperated and you cannot wait to hear that persons voice the first thing in the morning. Your partner should be your best friend if you want it to last and we all like/love our best friends.
Tell him the next time that you "like him" and he'll be at ease and so will you because there is no real difference in the two, they mean the same thing if you want them to.
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