A
female
age
51-59,
*exytrish36
writes:I have put this on another site but the replies were useless Apart from one and I thought id post it here to get some genuine replies!I met this guy online about 8 weeks ago... and everything was going fine... i have met his children and we have been going out on days out stayed over each others houses etc... and last weekend we was going to take the children to Isle of Wight, which we was all looking forwrd to.. He then asked me if he minded his Ex wife and her new partner and their child came along as it was her birthday. I didnt mind and as it happened she turned out to be really nice...her little girl (by her new partner) had a broken arm, due to bouncing off a trampoline, and she told me that she was having her plaster changed on tues.... At the end of the day, we swapped mobile numbers (as she said she didnt have many friends) and i texted her yesterday lunchtime to see how the little girl got on at the hospital...I forgot to tell my fella i had, but after a few hours i remembered and texted him and told him i had txted her, and he sent a text back saying not to text her about her little girl as she was not his child etc etc.. i said i was sorry but i havent heard from him since... which is worrying me as he usually unidates me with texts...Do you think i did wrong by textin his Ex wife?and do you think i have blown it with him?xx
View related questions:
ex-wife, his ex, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2008): Well done, good for you! I am proud of you.
Do not allow this guy to mess you around.
He obviously have some issues to deal with.
Be strong and keep going!
Good luck!
A
male
reader, koler  +, writes (19 June 2008):
My opinion is that he probably still has feelings for his ex, and was actually trying to make her jealous by bringing you there. However, he didn't get the right reaction from his ex that he was expecting and was basically sulking about it and taking it out on you. I'd give this guy some space, a lot of space ... He needs time to get over his ex before he enters into another serious relationship.
...............................
A
female
reader, sexytrish36 +, writes (18 June 2008):
sexytrish36 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Well he has just popped over...........with his over night stuff!!
I asked him outright why he was so dead against me having a friendship with his Ex wife...
His reply was.. its not the normal thing to do.. so i told him well you should have never invited her with us last week then.. Then he says look im coming on way to strong..he wants to slow it down a little.. so then i said well in that case i feel there is something else that he is not telling me and he just bowed his head... so i asked him to leave.. i think i did right as im sorry he made all the moves in the beginning of this relationship then he cools off.. im not going to be played a fool!!
Thank you for all your king words..
Trish xxx
...............................
A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (18 June 2008):
 Maybe you did blow it with him, but I see nothing wrong in what you did. If he didn't want you to have contact with his ex and her new family, why would he have included you with them in the outing? And what, you can't be concerned about a child that isn't his? The girl might not be his child but you can still ask about her well-being.
Doesn't sound logical to me. There's something more going on that what he has told you, I think. You haven't known him that long.
I think you need to ask him why he is so upset over a simple text. Especially as he was the one to introduce you to his exwife. It might not be pretty, there may be some history there, but I think it's worth asking the simple question. If he flies off the handle about it, then there clearly is more to the story than he has told you....
Take care.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2008): You did NOTHING wrong.
Nothing at all.
I think what you've done is very nice really.
I think he's over reacting and I agree with both of the oher comments.
You're a nice person don't feel bad or in the wrong for asking what should be considered a mutual friend (seeing as you both went on holidays with her) how her little girl is doing after she hurt her arm.
I'm a little worried about your statement "I forgot to tell my fella i had"... I hope you don't feel as though you have to check in with him when ever you do anything.
I don't think you've blown it. If he's reasonable then he'll start talking to you again in no time and apologise for being daft.
Good Luck. x
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2008): I agree with smiles, I think he has overreacted.
If could be that he didn't expect that you would get on well with his ex, and perhaps is fearful of any "conversations" you may enter with her - without him being controlling the situation or being present. I don't know but maybe even could be fearful of comparing notes!
Which ever is the case, I would not beat yourself up about it - he introduced you in a way which was friendly and innocent. Any normal women of substance would have probably done the same to check on the wee one. What you did was completely innocent and quite nice actually!
Let him get this one sorted in his head! You have apologised for this, although I really can't see what you needed to apologise for. If he didn't make it clear he didn't want you to have further contact, he should have made it much, much clear and it is a bit of a conflict in wishes when he was happy to holiday with her and her family.
I think he is really being a bit silly.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2008): Personally, I hope for your sake this guy is more mature then to react like this over something so innocent.
THere is probably another reason why he is so quiet, so just hang in there, don't let your imagination get the better of you.
I know this might be difficult, but keep your self busy, keep your mind occupied.
Tomorrow text him asking how he is doing?
Nothing more. Then wait and see.
If he is over reacting on something like this, you better get your boots and run, get away from him fast, but lets just wait and see, he might have a perfectly good answer.
Hang in there!
...............................
|
