A
female
age
,
*tretchy
writes:My boyfriend and I have been going out since May 2nd. I had a feeling 2 months ago he had an affair. so one night we were laying in bed and I asked him if he had ever had sex with her. he said no way not with all those stretch marks and flab. I knew then that he had slept with her. I have known her a lot longer than him and I never saw her stretch marks or flab. The next day I asked my brother who knew her real good to say that I knew about there affair and that she should talk to me about it. She outright admitted it and said it was just a fuck no kissing. He found out that I knew, He still 2 months later denys ever doing anything with her that she said that because she was mad at him for another issue. Yet after her and I talked it out she came over one night and gave me a hug right in front of him. She asked me if I forgive her and don't hate her. He asked me later what that as all about,I told him and he never even said a thing. I heard from her and other people he is a man whore. They said I should really wise up to what he really is. He has not come home twice and he said he fell asleep one night on some street and the other he was at his cousins. I asked him can his cousin verify that he said yes I said lets ask him, then he said well I slept in the driveway. When we fisrt got together he was not very romantic, He had to be high to have sex. He has since gotten alot more attentive to me. But I still cannot get the affair out of my mind cause he still won't admit it. He visits with girls with ou tme says I am to intimadating to them. Maybe there is more to that but I don't know. When ever a girlfriend of acquaintance of mine wants a ride he is always ready to drive them or help them. He lives in my house and he doesn't work. I basically support him I have no problem with that cause I do love him but the trust is wearing very thin. He suggested last night that he should move out ( he really doesn't have anywhere to go) if I can't stop with this jealously thing everytime a girl comes around. I know he has been really hurt in the past But I assured him I would not be that kind of person. I am not sure he believes it.Any imput would be helpful.
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affair, cousin, jealous, kissing, stretch marks Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Spiralvector +, writes (21 October 2009):
 Well I am going to go with the masses and say: Make the bad man go away.This is a nowhere road, he will keep cheating. Let it die now and avoid all the pain coming.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2009): There is a good reason that you don't trust him, he can look you in the eye and straight out lie.
Why do you love him? What is lovable about him? What are you afraid will happen if you give him the boot?
Personally, I can't see any good qualities in him from what you have told us. Start working on loving and accepting yourself. When you truly love yourself, you will not put up with people treating you this way, you put yourself first and become indignant if people treat you badly. Then you will find a good man, one who treats you well because you realize you deserve it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2009): He's good at manipulation; I'm actually impressed with his level of skill. Think about it: he doesn't work, lives for free and cheats on his meal ticket--I mean girlfriend. Not only does he cheat on you, he convinces you that you're the one with the problem and now you're worried about hurting him. Even with all sorts of evidence being presented to you (hell, the woman he cheated with admitted it), you still want to hold on to this jerk. Aren't you a little too old for this? How many times do you need to get the anvil dropped on your head before you get the picture? Get some self-esteem and realize that you deserve more than what he's offering.
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A
female
reader, sugar_sugar +, writes (21 October 2009):
 The fact you're on this website, and the information you include in your question suggests to me that you know that you need to leave him, you're just looking for a little push to do it.
He cheated on you, he won't let you meet his female friends in case you intimidate them - even though he's aware that your trust for him is lacking and thus he should be doing what he can to ease your mind - he's putting them first. He sounds like a manipulative. horrible man. And yet somehow, he's twisted the situation so that you're the one to blame for his actions. You need to get out of this relationship.
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A
male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (21 October 2009):
 OMG....
This guy is cheating on you big time. If you keep giving him these chances, you might as well get DOORMAT placed on your head, because he is walking all over you.
Please get rid of this bum. He is a liar and a loser
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2009): This guy is a major tool and you need to get rid of him fast! It's obvious that he's using you and you're the only one who doesn't see it. Honey it's not going to get better. You're going to end up with a broken heart or even worse an STD. It's obvious he cheated and you know he did.. So why are you putting up with the crap he's dealing you. Yeah, you may love him,, But he apparently doesn't love you near enough to respect you. He puts you down by making you look like you're the one at fault.. Btw.. He cheats on you because you let him!
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