A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I don't feel proud about this but I'm miserable and want some company. Just maybe it will help pull me out of this dark hole I'm in behind my own making. I feel like a hermit. I've shut myself up in my mom's basement for the past four or so months cry and kicking myself in my can for turning my best friend against me. I had sex with an old fling and my best friend found out. She thinks I used her but I didn't. I love her even though I cheated on her. I can't take it back but I see where she's mad. I took her virginity the night before I got caught. I don't make excuses for what I did. I fucked up. She's going out with my sister's cousin. I'm shot to hell in regret. She wrote me a letter and all it said was I hate you all over the front and back. I don't have another chance. I'm a dick. Am I the only dick who fucked himself up his can? Did anyone mess up worse then me? Maybe hearing your fuckup will make me see that others had it worse and survived? I'm afraid I'm going to end up spending the rest of my life a loser locked down in this basement. I feel awful bad. Please pull me out of this dungeon I got myself into. Thx every misery survivor
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2011): Everyone makes mistakes and you may feel loke this now but you need to do a bit of forgivng. Yes she has a right to be angry and you have a right to regret. But that is not the story of your life. This will pass and once you have gripped this pain you wil move forward and think more before you take risks with precious things. I know it is painful but you can take it. You care. That means you are a good person. There are not that many like you so even though this is crashing over you now use it for the best. Take responsibility, apologise and also recognise rhat you are one heck of a deep and caring person. You thought you might be able to act like other superficial people and could not. That means that you are destined to find a real true love and if you use the lesson be happy. I know it sounds like fluff in your situation as it is now but it will prove to be true.
A
male
reader, II_Seraphim_II  +, writes (3 February 2011):
Hey, atleast you are admitting you are wrong, and not making excuses for your actions. That's the first and most important thing. Now you should concentrate on bettering yourself. Everyone makes mistakes, that's not crime. The real crime is when you do nothing to rectify those mistakes. So stop crying and beating yourself up, and resolve to make yourself a better person. Start going back into the world. See your old friends, and when the time is right, call your now ex and apologize nicely and explain that you were wrong. She will probably get angry, but don't emotional yourself. Just apologize and say your part. I can't guarantee you will get her back, but with any luck you may regain some of her respect and maybe become friends again.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2011): Don't be so hard on yourself, we all make mistakes. Write a letter to the girl telling her how sorry you are that you messed up and it makes you realise a few things etc. Come out of the basement, get together with friends, the first step is awlays the hardest, but once you have done it you will be fine. Remember people have done a lot worse, you regret what you did, which to me is a massive good point to your character.... think of all those bums that cheat every day and dont care who they hurt and love the cheating. You sound like a good person, start believing it yourself. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2011): Look you made a mistake. You human, we all do things from time to time that we regret. You can only apologise where it is neccessary and then try to put it behind you. Time really does ease things and everyone involved with your issue will move on. So learn whatever lesson you can from this, make sure the relevant people know of your regret and move on. Easy to say I know, but there is no magic bullet.
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