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male
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anonymous
writes: i been in love wiv this girl for quite a few years but she a good friend and she goes out with someone but when they break up soon i will ask her but im to scared this ruin a great friendship Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (30 June 2006):
 If she's a great friend, then you can't ruin your relationship with her unless you do something 'waaayyy off centre, like start getting aggro or possessive around her.
Continue to treat her like a great friend no matter how the romantic side of things plays out, and don't change the respect you have for her, or the fun side that makes you a good friend to be around.
Whether or not she's interested in seeing you as a boyfriend, you don't really have to worry about "ruining" anything by asking out a friend. Strong friendships can survive a few bumps like the one caused by the awkwardness of tentative romance.
If for some reason you don't work out as romantic partners, it's still OK. You might have to "lick your wounds" for a little while, and there might be a little residual embarrassment, but you won't lose a friend for good. If anything, she'll be flattered to find out about the depth of your affection!
Remember though, even though you can show interest in dating her "when" she breaks up with the current boyfriend, it's not too smart to want to jump straight into a relationship with you. It would only make you a rebound person, and cheapen what you might otherwise have. Instead, let her know that you're interested, but don't rush things. Let her get over the previous guy first.
Good luck!
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