A
female
age
30-35,
*nH89
writes:Hey everyone, so I have some concerns regarding custody and visitation. As of now my daughter is about to turn three and her father is most likely going to be taking me to court. The past three years he has had very little to do with her, and when he has seen her he makes her cry or afraid. He has been arrested for beating up his mom, and I had a restraining order on him. I had to take the restraining order off because he threatened to get one on me, and if that happens Id get kicked out of my college. Now Im afraid to get another because the judge probably wont be nice to me. He is also on anti psychotic medications. The past three years have been terrible dealing with him! Now he has this new trashy girlfriend and she has a three year old daughter too. Well she threatened me in a text message. Now Im even more stuck trying to protect my daughter because now I have her and him abusing me. Last time her father came to my house he threatened both me and my daughter and threw a pencil at my mom. But then he turns around and acts like he is an angel. Im really worried because if he goes to court I don't want him to get anything other then supervised visits and I do not want my daughter around that girl!! I have a lazy eye and her text was threatening my life and calling me a cross eyed B**ch. :( I don't know what to do. I don't know how she even knows about my eye unless he was making fun of me to her and I don't want my daughter hearing that. Im going to counseling because this is all really hard to deal with. Please help me :(.
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female
reader, KnH89 +, writes (14 July 2010):
KnH89 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you guys so much!!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2010): My friend is going through a similar case. Save the text. Take a picture of the text on your phone and print it out. Get a cheap spy camera that faces on your front door. Maybe if you have a computer set it up near the door and get a little camera that sits on top. Chat cameras are like $30. That way you can record anything that they do when they come over.
Definitely get a lawyer. Talk to you school and state the danger to you and your daughter. Can they make an exception on restraining orders?
DOCUMENT, RECORD, TAKE NOTES on everything you can. Build you own case file against him. Day, time, location. Stick to the facts only.
Request an evaluator from the court.
You will win and he will lose if all you say is true. Put into his file any lawsuits, judgements or criminal record. The lawyer, the judge and the evaluator need to know everything.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (6 July 2010):
 You need to get a lawyer. Make sure you keep any emails from the girlfriend or the father. I'm sure with his record you'll be able to keep full custody and make his visitations supervised. I think he truly poses a threat.
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