A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'll start by saying, I could be pregnant... Yet to find out but, any ideas or info you can give me is great. I don't like doctors much so I rarely go, I was just thinking when I was born mum and I both almost died, same with my older sister and mum's first miscarriage, all had that reaction. Is there a chance that it could happen with me. And also I was born with less then 30 percent of my hearing, as in close to being deaf, same with my dad. I went through operations and am fine now but what are my baby's chances of having ear problems? I don't want my child to have the pain I had to put up with.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2008): Thankx lazy guy great answer and yes ill go to a doc.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2008): Thanks talk too much, I will go to a doctor, you made things a bit easier.
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (26 November 2008):
 Talk to a doctor. What was the reason of your mothers problems with her pregnancies? Is it hereditary? If not, then there is no worry. If it is, still doesn't mean you got it.
Same with the hearing, since that is the same as your dad, it might affect your child as well BUT 21 years of medical progress might have changed things. Maybe it is now trivial to cure. For that matter, if you have the same deafness as your father, does your sister? Whose genes are more dominant. Lets say you got it from your father, then your kid will get it from your partner, not your father. Maybe you got the genes for your reproduction from your dad as well, meaning you skip your mother problems altogether?
Just to many variables that your doctor SHOULD know the answer to but nobody from an advice column can possibly answer.
I can only suggest one thing, you mother knew how risky pregnancy was and yet did it 3 times. Miscarriage, your sister and you. Why? Because the risk was worth it to her?
Perfectly healthy parents can get a child with a disability, some far worse then deafness which you know yourself can be corrected. Should they not risk it? Were you loved less because you were almost deaf? Would you have wanted your mother to abort you if she had known you would be deaf or that the pregnancy would be risky?
Parents want the best for their kids, 10 toes, 10 fingers a perfect nose. Reality is that this doesn't always happen. It is life. It ain't perfect but what else are you going to do. Even if you get a clean bill of health, things can still happen. And if there is a chance of your child inheriting your ear defect, there is also a chance he/she will get it from her father and be perfectly healthy.
Life is risk, don't let fear of the unknown stop you from living life to the fullest. If your own life is worth living, so will be life of your baby if an when you choose to have one.
But really, talk to a doctor, if you are at risk, they are trained to limit those risks. It has been two decades since you were born. Things have improved a LOT.
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