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female
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*ccy
writes: weve been together for 3 yrs,.i dont understand his attitude towards me sometimes he likes me sometimes he dont..his 45 yrs of age and im only 21,,but i do loved him,.but his always holding back,.because of our age gap.. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Kyoko +, writes (31 March 2006):
Has it always been like this? If it's just now then something is happening to him. Try to find out. Talk to him, let him know you care!!!!
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female
reader, bodylotion +, writes (27 March 2006):
 I don't think this is lightly as you have been together 3 years already.Could there be something happening in his life which you don't see?Then talk to him and tell him how you feel,explain that you won't be his doormat.This relation ship is unhealthy.Mabe try taking councling if this doesn't work then the realtion will stay and won't go any further.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2006): Many age gap relationships work well but it's totally dependant on the two people involved. While you don't give much info on what is going on 'within' your relationship, I'm just going give you a basic opinion on what I feel 'could' be the problem. I could be right or I could be wrong. But I will say, age gap relationships do pose some problems over the long term. What I will say below, may not necessarily be your problem..it's just something to consider.
All relationships flux and people change, no matter the ages. If you two have been dating successfully for 3 years, and now there's a change..is sounds like your relationship is shifting. It could be caused by the typical 'honeymoon-is-over syndrome' or "you-both-are-growing-apart syndrome'. These will affect any couple, age-gap or otherwise. But...because of the large age gap, the expectations are shifting quickly and are felt in a more pronounced fashion. What didn't make a difference 3 years ago, btween you two, could be now rearing it's ugly head. The big gap or cross-generational attitude of his could be playing 'catch up". Perhaps, what was fun and enthusiatic about your relationship 3 years ago-now, maybe doesn't appeal to him, anymore. This is where the aging process are coming into play here. Simply put, he's settling down more. You are both on different life maps, and he could be noticing the glaring differences and it's bothering him. With some older men, the activities and lifestyles of younger people, do eventually get far less attractive and may become boring for them. Older people often find the enthusiasms of youth amusing. They may tolerate it for awhile, but many older men do not want the youthful activities, to be part of a serious relationship for themselves. They want to slow down. They usually want a partner, who shares in their own life-plan, and thinks and wants the same things, he desires in life. I think it's time for both of you to talk..to find out if you can overcome these differences. I wish you the best and I hope it works out for you. Try not to worry...take this relationship one day at a time. But please talk to him. Find out what is bothering him..it will ease your mind and it will give you direction as to where this relationship is headed. Good luck, dear
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male
reader, d4u04  +, writes (27 March 2006):
 It will never be a healthy relationship if one of you has issues about age. If he's not comfortable with it and won't become comfortable over time then the relationship is doomed anyway. Just tell him that it doesn't matter what anyone thinks and love is love, no matter how old you are. And finally, do you really want to compramise what we have because of socialist insecurities.
good luck hun.
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