A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend cant seem to get all the way hard before we have sex. He is a vrigin and I am not. And he tells me that it is not because he scared or anything, he just cant get all the way hard. I mean I have tried to do just about everything to help the situation along. But is there anything else that might help? Could he have a subconcious fear of having sex? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, daletom +, writes (24 November 2009):
You might be right. I think it's something like 5% of guys who can't get hard the first time they try to have sex, but the condition resolves itself on the 2nd or 3rd try (often, within an hour or so) and isn't a major problem after that. (About 94% of guys have the opposite problem: they climax way too soon he first time they have sex.)
Can you bring him to orgasm in other ways? If it's a case of "just nervousness", he might do better if you help him to a preliminary climax, then try insertion after his re-charge period. (If he's about your age that'll probably be only 15 - 20 minutes, during which the two of you continue with kissing, caressing and other foreplay.)
A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (24 November 2009):
 Yes, I think that anything is possible regarding sexual angst.
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