A
female
age
36-40,
*ears-That-Fall
writes:i have just joined this site to answer peoples problems... but i also have a problem myself.i have been with my boyfriend for a year now, i love him more than anything in this world. but these past few months things have changed, its like i dont know him anymore. he tries to control me, what i wear, who im with, where i go ect...i have just been accepted into doing some cataloge modelling, im so proud because this is my dream to do modelling,my family are so proud of me but my boyfriend said i shouldn't do it because its tacky, i dont see how it is, its not like its glamour modelling, its just clothes modelling, now i feel like hes getting in the way of my dreams, hes already spoiled my chance of being a dancer (i went to college to study dance for 2 years, but he told me to stop) so i did. im letting him control my life because i love him. he said im not pretty enough to do modelling, he likes me to dress in baggy clothes, he dont let me where make-up... why is he doing this to me? now im thinking of just throwing yet another dream away for him, hes not doing much with his life, he just has a normal job but has no goals in life. i feel like leaving him but i love him despite his controlling ways. i cant speak to him about this because he gets abusive and violent, i admit im terrified of him at times, i feel like im walking on egg shells when im around him. what should i do? i really want to do this but how can i when he wont let me?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (26 March 2010):
 You're giving advice on this site now, so turn around and look at your question objectively. What advice would you give yourself? You can not stay in this relationship, not if you want to be happy in your life. I'm not even going to lay out why - re-read your question for that. He's an awful person who just wants to control you and hold you captive to whatever he wants... not to mention, he's violent. He is an all around monster.
AND, it doesn't matter how many good times you've had. This alone outweighs any good times. You deserve more than this, you deserve to have someone who wants you to succeed and be happy and be successful in the career that you want. This man is not that guy. He is an asshole.
Dump him IMMEDIATELY. Don't wait.
Good luck, sweetness!
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