A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Im in a gay relationship of four years. It's been up and down but I've never questioned my love and what I want from the relationship...a future, commitment, living together etc. My girlfriend has been and done all that with a lot more people expect the marriage part but been in long relationships and engaged (I have never) and doesn't really see the point of doing it again. She's much older than me and She likes her own space and company and I annoy her sometimes by pestering as I get lonely so like the company. I've never been big on friends so company and talking is nice for me. She has always said being in a relationship is commitment but I want more commitment. Over the years she has said good things as in I want to marry you etc but then other times she doesn't see the point. I see after four years it's time to move on to the next step but she doesn't she says we are too rocky which is mainly because of no commitment!! What do I do...I don't just want all that with anyone, I want it with her?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (10 March 2017):
 Sweetie have you posted this a few times? If not then someone else is in the same position as you. Honestly if you want marriage and commitment then you need to leave this woman. She just wants to pass the time with you. If she loved you then she would want to commit to you. She has been engaged in the past but that just tells me she is not as in to you as you are to her.
A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (1 March 2017):
 It is a hard choice for you and I sympathise. It will take a lot of courage to split. However if I can offer you this? Sometimes you have to drop certain things in order for something new and better to come into your life.
You may still remain friends with your older partner, but in the end you have to agree you have come to a part where the road divides. It is sad but now you know what you want you should consider searching for you true happiness.
What's the alternative? You put up with what you've got.
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