A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I found out that my fiance has feelings for another guy. We have had a stressfull few months,she started a new job, im about to lose mine, im clearly suffering from stress and depression but not getting any support from her, she ended up turning to this guy. i dont know what to do. i need her more than anything right now but dont know if i can continue our relationship knowing that she has feelings for someone else.
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male
reader, rcn +, writes (26 February 2008):
I think having a good, long conversation with her is needed. Tell her how you feel about all this and how the stress is affecting you.
There's also another side of this to consider. It is okay if emotional support is not being provided, for whatever reason, to have a friend to turn to for getting feelings out. If engaged and that friendship crosses the boundaries of friendship to sexual contact, then you need to consider if this is someone who'd made a good bride for you. If those behaviors are such that are acceptable to you and how you are treated. It may also show that she's dependant, which won't change even after saying "I do".
A
female
reader, O Connor +, writes (25 February 2008):
well you cant keep hiding these feelings from her, you need to confront her and let her know how you feel. tell her that you need more support from her and that you need to talk about her feelings for this other man. you may also want to consider putting off the wedding until the two of you have worked things out and are back on the straight and narrow. this is puttings extra pressure on both of you and you need to deal with you other problems without the added pressure of the impending wedding. she may need some support also, so talking about it will get both of your feelings out in the open.
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