A
female
age
30-35,
*_Mae93
writes: my ex and i have been broke up for 2 months and 2 days. we have a 9 month old daughter together. a week or 2 ago he told me that he missed me he kissed me cuddled with me ect. last friday he came over to see the baby and he layed his head in my lap and just stared up at me. he is dating someone but he says he isn't happy with her cause she only cares about her feelings and wants everything to make her happy and not caring about his feelings or anything. i asked him if we could get back together and he said no that he didnt even wanna get close to me again cause he didnt wanna get hurt. we broke up because he was doing everything to make me happy he pampered me and spoiled me did everything for me i never told him thank you or anything and he felt like everything he was doing wasn't good enough. he says he isn't over me but he don't have the same feelings for me like he used to. he was the best ever he really loved me he came into my life when i wasnt even looking for love or a relationship i had just had a horrible relationship with my last ex. like how people say don't go looking for anyone or dont go looking for love. i didn't look for him or love it came to me. we met on myspace i never met anyone online but something told me to meet him and we just got along so great. it was like we had known each other all our lives. since we have been broke up i don't feel the same anymore. i'm unhappy i'm not interested in any other guy at all. when i don't text him for a few days he ends up texting me when he comes around to see the baby he's all flirty like tuesday he took me to the dr when he clearly didn't have to he was playing around with me like sticking his finger in my ear touching my face and squeezing my cheeks. why can't i let him go an move on after we have been broken up for 2 months. is there a reason?
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female
reader, Brandy205 +, writes (21 May 2012):
Two months is not a very long time at all to get over someone, especially when that someone is the father of your child. These things take time. I can tell that you still have very strong feelings for him and he seems to have strong feelings for you, however because it sounds like he is implying that you took him for granted while you were together, he doesn't want to get into that situation all over again and be hurt even more the second time around. If you really want to get over him then my advice would be for you to not spend so much time with him. Perhaps you could arrange for him to pop round and see the baby while you are out and your parents are looking after the baby, that way he will still get to see his child but you won't be more inclined to get emotionally wrapped up in him. I truly believe in the phrase: 'Out of sight, out of mind'. I hope things work out for the best.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2012): Hmm perhaps the fact that he's coming over and being very affectionate is the reason? I don't know about you but when someone I love touches me it stirs very strong emotions in me. I don't see how you can get over him when he's acting that way.
If you want to get over him then you have to cut off contact in every way except for your kid. No more touching. If he can't be yours then he can't keep feeding your emotions like this if he won't agree to stop touching you and flirting then you'll have to arrange a neutral venue where he can see his child. Maybe drop your child off at his parents house or your parents house and he can visit there.
OP you're not going to get over him while you two still act like a couple. So either stop that or just live with the fact that he'll always get so close to you that you can taste him but you can never have him.
To me the choice is simple.
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