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*utie_pie1990
writes: Hi,Please help me,This girl I walk to college with has been seeing her boyfriend for about 3 months. She recently told me that she's never fancied him, and that she likes him as a mate. Her boyfriend is also my friend and I do my duties with him at school. I don't think that she should be going out with him, especially when she told me about a week ago, that there's someone else she likes and that she's waiting to see if he'll go out with her before she dumps her current boyfriend. I don't think it's fair on the guy because he's fancied her for about 2 years.I know I shouldn't get involved with their relationship, but I can't help feeling guilty knwoing something he doesn't when he's my friend. please help Luv robyn xxx Reply to this Question
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male
reader, flipdrew +, writes (8 January 2006):
 Straight and to the point: keep your mouth shut. The probability that he will believe you when you tell him is slim. The fact that he has "fancied" her for so long has blinded him and you bringing up bad things about a girl that he holds on a pediastal will bring about bad consiquences. He will most likely be angry at YOU and tell her what you said. Congratulations, you just made two enimies (and countless others when she starts tralking shit about you) As much as you think "i'd want to know if i were in that position", you really wouldn't...he would most likely see it as jealousy on your part and hold it aginst you or think you were trying to ruin his relationship. He doesn't want his "perfect" girl ruined by you (and that's how he'll see it) It is best to stay out of other peoples relationships even if that someone is a close and dear friend. If it was your business, they would have invited you into the relationship too.
A
female
reader, kellyO  +, writes (6 January 2006):
 Dearie, i understand how u feel. This guy is your friend and you feel partly responsible to tell him what is going on.
I really dont like involving myself with other problems like that cause i learnt a bitter lesson in the past.
When i was much younger the same happened to me. i have a couples who were good friends. The lady told me she was tired of her bf and was going to dump his soon. she said she has better-looking guys approaching her. I decided to tell my friend what she told me. I am afraid i became the middle of a confrontation and i was the one blamed at the end of the day. Both settled and stopped speaking to me. Infact less than a month later she did dump her as she boasted!
Alot of people can see this from different sides of the coin. My own advise is u should have scolded her when she she this but regardless, if she brings it up again then u can talk to her or if it bother u much u can bring it up with her and tell her that u werent happy with what she said the other day. Let her know that if she isnt interested in your friend then she should at least tell him. She owes him that much.Let she know that she should stop playing games with your friend and she should tell him how she feels or else you will.
All the best dear.
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