A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have a strange sexual thing happening to me that I want advice on. I have been with a girl for 9 months now after a 20 year relationship (14 married). The sex is great...I think, but I have a problem reaching orgasm from vaginal sex. Oral or handjobs I cum like crazy, but it takes me forever to cum from her pussy. I get real close sometimes, but I've only been able to twice in many hundred of times we've had sex. Both times was doggie style, which ironically, was the hardest position for me to cum with my ex. Usually we have sex in many positions and she finishes me off orally. We both love it, but I know she would like me to pull out and cum more often.I really think a lot has to do with how she feels inside. I never had this problem with my ex wife, I think because her vagina was "rougher"...best comparison I can think of is like the top of your tongue vs. the bottom. I used to cum the most with my ex from cowgirl, but this new girl is frankly not very good at cowgirl...she goes back and forth on it, not up and down.I've tried to make myself more sensitive by laying off masturbation, looking at porn and doing more foreplay, but it has little effect aside from just making me cum harder. I have been warming her up for anal (stretching, etc) because we both haven't done it and want to. I'm hoping that may be a way to get me to cum more from intercourse, but some guys have told me the rectum is actually very smooth compared to the vagina, so I don't know.Is there a lube or something that adds friction? I know that sounds counter-intuitive, but I am wondering what I can do.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2010): As the previous comment, she might be too wide for you. It's possible, and you of course, might be too small. I had that problem - the latter in my case. What finally worked? Someone who hadn't had sex before, a lot of stamina, and a partner with a lot of stamina. Some might also say that emotional confidence plays a part. Being so anxious about not coming, will in fact affect your performance as well.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2010): i think may be she is too wide down there for u. There is a thing she can do as contracting her muscles there and make it tighter. As for anal sex, as a woman i've tried it several times, and nothing but pain and discomfort came out of that. I also was bleeding a little bit from there and found the wholle process quite afwull.
Men treat anal sex the same as vaginal, and i don't think it's a very good idea. it 's much tighter of-course, that's why guys like it so much, but all the women i talked to completely dislike it, and do it only to pleasure men.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2010): Well maybe she really does love finishing with her sucking or that may be a habit for her... Anal well from what my ex told me its just a little tighter not smoother or rougher. My suggestion for reg. sex maybe use the magnum twister that might make it have more friction than enjoy. Have her try reverse cowgirl and use ur ankles to go up and down and if u want it faster u can control by grabbing her ass and pushing up and down. Good luck
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2010): Don't know if we're having the same issue, but I find as I get older I need more direct & maintained stimulation than I used to. After a few minutes of vaginal sex she seems to become stretched enough that I feel less and less. The good news is you last longer; the bad news is that you don't stay as hard.
You may have more success with anal. Yes, once you're all the way in it's much smoother. But the first bit, around the sphincter, is so tight that if you focus on that part it makes a world of difference.
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