A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Okay this question strictly applies to sex ; theres no relationship problems involved. So if anyone has knowledge about this please respond. Okay, i'm a young female and whenever I lost my virginity two years ago. And i've had sex since. However, whenever I attempt to have sex it's extremely difficult for the guy to enter my vagina. I'm extremely tight, but other than that it becomes a bit painful for me too, and afterwards, i am sore for a couple of days. Can anyone tell me why this happens or help me figure out what I should do in order to stop this from happening?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2011): U should try using a dildo first
A
female
reader, Cupid_or_Stupid  +, writes (27 March 2011):
 I was very tight for my first 7 or 8 times. You just kinda stretch out the more you do it.
Try and relax more. Use lots and lots of foreplay. Like a few people have already suggested, oral sex for either of you will especially help 'naturally' lubricate you and maybe you should even try artifical lube? I found just using a condom made it more comfortable. Even now my boyfriend can struggle to get in me if we're not using a condom.
This is a personal question but - do you masterbate?
Masterbating can help prepare your body. It can help loosen you up a little and help build your confidence so you relax more during sex.
Also, if you are finding him overpowering try controlling his speed by holding his hips and guiding him yourself to a pace that suits you.
I don't know if this would apply either but I think you should maybe keep to simple positions until you are more confortable too as moving around and getting yourselves tangled up will put your body in weird positions and if you're fragile this won't help!
I've found the best way to avoid pain is to start off with him on top and once he's in and you're a little more relaxed, switch to being on top so you control how hard and fast it goes, it also keeps your body straight helping to reduce pain. :)
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A
female
reader, shiori +, writes (20 March 2011):
this may sound weird but why not have it with a girl. their gentler and it'll be less painful. or you could get your boyfriend to be less aggressive if he is.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2011): Ok so this is a problem I have a lot myself. My boyfriend often says it feels like he's taking my virginity all over again. So here are a couple of things I've learned over the years about the situation:1. Your comfort is key! Before you have sex you have to be comfortable, in the bed, chair, floor, backseat or wherever you have sex and be mentally prepared to have something enter you.2. Lubrication lubrication lubrication!! If you're one of those people who doesn't like artificial lube(like me) then use your mouth. Wet up the condom/penis with your mouth and he can wet you up with his mouth as well.(i mean really wet) Then it slips in easier3. Don't freak out if it starts hurting. Relax first, inhale deeply, then when you exhale then the guy should try to penetrate deeper.4. Most importantly of all, please please please do not have sex before your ready. The mentality of sex is ten times as strong as the physical act. So if its painful, it is possible your not ready yet and could damage sex for you.Good Luck in the future!!
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A
female
reader, GeeGee255 +, writes (20 March 2011):
 Sounds like you need some extra lubrication. You can buy it in any drugstore. Also try it with you on top, because it gives you more comfort and control. If it still hurts you may need a doctors exam to see if you have some extra skin getting in the way.
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