A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Long distance relationships are incredibly hard and I know that not everyone can handle them. I was with my ex-bf locally for a few months and we fell head over heels in love. Then I moved across the country for work. We were long distance for over a year, seeing each other for a weekend about once a month, before he broke it off saying he just couldn't handle it anymore. I had planned to move to be with him in a year's time when my contract is up, but he says it feels like an eternity when he is so unhappy right now. He says that it's just the distance, that things would be very different if we were in the same place. Has anyone been in this situation before and had a relationship come apart because of the distance? Has anyone successfully gotten back together when they were able to be in the same place again?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2009): well i meet a girl years ago and i only saw her once in a few months but after a year she broke up with me cause she met another guy. We grew apart then i got over her. 3 years pass and out of no where she text me. then on Valentines i asked her if she wanted to be mine for that day and since then we been together. maybe time again you might get with him but when you do start over again like you never met him before who knows .....
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2009): Even though the inverse square law states that force and distance are inversely related...not in love I say...Love is capable of overcoming all obstacles. Physicists cannot speak for matters of the heart....(sigh...melancholic) I wish it were true, but honestly if two people haven't gone through the times and strife to cement their relationship, along with the joys and hardship necessary to fuse two in one, there is little chance that they will be able to withstand the distance. You have already been forewarned by an earlier failed attempt, and your boyfriend's doubts and misgivings have been refreshed before you even embark into another episode, so ...I say the future of this LDR looks grim * feels sad*. However, if you do try, I wish you guys the best...*keeping fingers crossed*-g
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A
female
reader, beautygirl  +, writes (12 November 2009):
I must say that long distant relationships can be difficult but if you really care for each other and you are meant to be it will work out. It is possible though and for your convenience i will add some tips that may help you get through yours.Step 1Keep in touch daily. If large phone bills are a concern, send e-mail, letters, cards and even faxes.Step 2Plan reunions to keep both of you pleased about the relationship. If your partner needs closeness, set up plans to meet often. Having a date to look forward to can help you through the rough times.Step 3Reaffirm your love and commitment to one another. Try not to assume that the relationship is thriving. Listen to your partner's concerns and communicate your own before they become bigger problems.Step 4Keep your partner informed about your life. You may live separately, but sharing information about your activities and friends is still important.5Trust in one another. Suspicion will only break the relationship down.Step 6Keep the relationship a high priority. Avoid canceling reunions or putting off a phone call.Step 7Focus on the future. Make plans to live in the same city eventually. Plan a reunion in a city other than the ones you live in. Having a weekend getaway or vacation together can help recharge the relationship and reinforce your commitment.Find ways to reduce the costs of travel and phone calls so you can meet and talk more often.Surprise your loved one with an unexpected visit or a bouquet of flowers to keep the passion alive. Be patient - it may take time for long-term plans to work out.Consider other creative means of expressing your devotion: Scrawl confessions on a mirror, fan or piece of cloth. Fire off a quick succession of postcards.Good Luck!
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