A
female
age
51-59,
*xcsb
writes:i recently posted a question about my boyfriend lieing to me about being on dating sites/sex sites. I know its wrong for me to check in his email but ever since I first found out about his lieing of this I guess I've lost trust in him. He has asked me to give him another chance to work things out. Even though we live 2 hours apart its hard to trust and believe him. He says hes been telling me the truth and doesnt do this anymore. I've given him the benefit of the doubt and giving it another chance. Well, again he is lieing about it. I just so would like to trust him. Can someone explain why guys like dating/sex sites if they are in a relationship? Maybe theres something I can understand or try to accept about this. I care about him and want it to work. I've tried to let it not bother me. But it has caused problems between us. How can one get trust again? Just trying to understand. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2008): im male,i always go on sex sites and its because, well men can't get enough of girls! (unless they're gay) u shouldn't worry about him every guy does it.
hope this has helped!!!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2008): You can download something called "Webwatcher" on his PC while he is out. Then you can log onto it from anywhere and see exactly what he is doing. It sounds as though you need to know, but once you do how long before you decide he is not good enough for you? The latter may be the case, decide what you are worth and stick to it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2008): I would have to say that when men start looking elsewhere, it is because they feel unfulfilled, that something is missing, and maynot know what that is. Being social, even at places not acceptable, can help trigger in themselves that they can't do on their own. Of course, there are consequences, but some people, men and women, become desperate for answers and solutions, and may go to any length to get there, even if it means regrets latter, which isn't a part of the equation when they are searching.
The disconnect between partners sometimes has ill effects, like a wife withholding sex from the husband. The wife may feel she has a right, and she does, but there are consequences to this type of action, for the man feels rejected, less valuable in her eyes, and will seek acceptance from others. We often refuse to look in deep into are hearts and minds to understand the real reason and cause of some of our actions, and those actions affect others, which keeps the vicious circle going round and round until we split apart.
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (25 March 2008):
 Why do you lump dating/sex sites together? One makes me think of sites like matchmaker and the other of porn? Or do you mean something like adultfriendfinder (often spammed site for hooking up purely for sex).
Porn, well men are horny toads. Subject been discussed often enough.
Dating sites, well that means he is looking to upgrade pure and simple. It could be semi-serious or really serious.
Car anology time! (sorry, /. thing, if you don't know, don't ask)
Say your BF owns a car, he might then very look at car mags to drool over cars he can never ever get. On the other hand he may be browsing for a new car to replace his OR be looking for a second car.
But you ain't a car, you got feelings and can't do 0 to 60 in ten flat. (sorry, will stop it now)
Basically it seems that either he doesn't care his actions hurt you or is not mature enough to stop himself. He knows that you don't like it, and continues doing it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2008): Because they're horny little things.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2008): i think guys go on these sites because they do not think their g/f is good enough that they are not going the next step so if you are not comfortable going the next step then leave him i would leave him anyway because he lied to you twice gurl leave him he doesn't really love you
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2008): Not to be rude its because some men are just down right perverted I have heard the average man thinks about sex every 7 seconds and male's 16-21 cant go a month without sex, its possible he's not getting what he wants from you and you do not have to give it to him, he does not deserve it if he cant stop lieing to you, but try to talk things over with him best of luck to you and your boyfriend.
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