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male
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*elpme100
writes: My girlfriend has been cheating on me for 6 months behind my back. We took a break over Christmas, when she met this guy and continued to see him when we got back together in February. She told me last week and said that she loved him but loved me also. She asked me to forgive her to which I said no. Out of curiosity I said I had to know all of the information first and asked to read her texts. I couldn't believe it when I saw them. The guy has been playing every arguement I ever had with her against me.It hurts that I know I can never be with her again but I have a feeling she is now thinking about a serious relationship with this guy. He also has a girlfriend and daughter and has told her he would leave if it wasn't for his daughter. I still love her so much and really don't want her to get hurt by this guy. Do you think he is using her? I know I should really hate her for what's she's done but just can't seem to. What do you think I should do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2006): I think being your gf's man-concubine is an excellent way to live your life. Of course, if you cannot tell, I am being sarcastic.
I believe though there is still hope for you to break out of this supposed love of yours, I also believe that you should just smile, nod and accept whatever comes her and your way. Since you have taken the liberty of accepting such an immoral union in the first place.
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female
reader, shania  +, writes (22 May 2006):
 Yes he is using her but as the old saying goes,she has made her bed...so let her lie in it.Does that sound harsh? Perhaps...but she didn't think twice on cheating on you so i wouldn't be too sympathetic with her.Your a decent guy and its obvious that you care for her but you could wait forever.This other man has made it clear that he wont leave his girlfriend because of his daughter( same old excuse) so what might happen is she will leave him and come running back to you...but do you want to be second best? When you love someone it is hard to let go but there is nothing you can do,personally i would try to move on and let her get on with it.Remember...the trust is gone now..
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