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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi.I hope someone can give me some advice or help put things in perspective for me. I am a teacher at a college and am worried about a student. She is quite ill and seems to need my help a lot. The problem is that I can't handle her being around and don't want her to return next semester. Am I being too selfish by not wanting her to return? I feel that the emotional burden of her being sick and me feeling that I have to look out for her will be too much. Can I do something to convince her not to return? My partner thinks I should just let her do what she wants. He is getting frustrated with me worrying about this. Is he right? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, whatever +, writes (4 November 2005):
I think you shouldn't have to feel so much pressure but just remember that you seem to have someone who really looks up to you and depends on you for help. She won't be in college forever and imagine if you could just give her a helping hand through this short transition in her life, you could really make a difference. It would be wise to gently steer her towards outside help and perhaps get her to hang around with more of the students. Other than that just remember she's only going to be in college for the course length, after that things will return to normal.
A
reader, Rebecca Batchelor +, writes (4 November 2005):
 Your partner is right and wrong. Yes, indeed, this student should be allowed to return to college to continue her studies but you shouldn't have to carry the emotional burden if she does return.
I think the best thing for you to do is approach other teachers or the yearhead or headteacher (whichever applies) and seek advice. The burden should at least be shared, you should not be shouldering all of it.
I don't know if this student is emotionally ill but she shouldn't just be receiving help from you but others who can assist her also. If she only attends your classes and not any others, then you do need to approach the headmaster with this problem and receive some support. This student shouldn't only be relying on your care.
I do hope this helps.
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