A
male
age
,
*ma.com
writes:I was married for 21 years, Been divorced for 9 yrs. now. In and out appox 7 relationships nothing seems to work out a year or less. Did not date, hug, kiss, nothing for two years. Then i met a classmate of mine ,told her i didn't want a relationship, she did. So i thought i'll try it just someone to hang with, Movies, fishing a good friend.Well the Love bug hit me. Fell head over heels after about 6 months. Finally a good woman, she was my rock ,Never in my life have i ever been treated so good and loyal. Then i was getting a little scared, Could this be the one? Started backing off i'll see ya when i see ya kinda thing, Although it was still only her and seeing each other, still true to each other. I told her i didn't want to be in a (relationship) any more, just date, She at least wanted to be labelled as my girlfriend, I told her no labels, Just enjoy life each day. So we have been for the last month and a half. Then i found out she has been talking to other men on other dating sites, Got her pic up on all dating sites, And listed as looking for (Dating and relationship) Well i found out about this got furious, Had it out with her and everything. She threatened me with going out the following weekend with another man she had met on a website, but broke down cancelled her date. Now i feel like emotionally she has cheated on me, going doing things behind my back, she won't lie to me if i ask her about things, but she won't give me anything neither, only if i ask her, I love her dearly and her children, But now i have a trust issue, Or was i looking for a reason to begin with? Cannot really bear the thought of her in the arms of another man, (sexually) more than anything. But we were together last night, All was good. Are we wasting our time just waiting for mr.and mrs. right? Please someone help me out. Don't bang on me to hard i know i can be a complicated person. Thanks
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female
reader, shania  +, writes (4 September 2010):
 You said that you didn't want a proper relationship...you said that you wanted someone to hang out with,you also told her that you didn't want a commitment,she got that message,loud and clear..so your lady friend decided to look elsewhere, maybe to see if she could meet someone who would fall in love with her, want to settle down with her and be a proper, loving couple.So why are you ranting on? You made it pretty clear on where she stood...What did you expect her to do? Wait for you for the next 100 years while you dither about? Sorry but life is too short for that.So if you dont want her then let her find someone who will but i think its the old chestnut where you dont really want her...but you dont want anyone else to have her...Thats a bit selfish, dont you think?
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