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Can a relationship with a much older guy work?

Tagged as: Age differences<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 June 2008) 8 Answers - (Newest, 21 June 2008)
A female India age 30-35, anonymous writes:

i have a very deep attraction towards a boy. and i feel he too have an attraction for me. but i am 14 and he may be 24-26.is this relation possible?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2008):

I'm sorry hun, but the answer is no...would you be able to live with yourself if he went to jail for being involved with you?

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A female reader, scrazy Canada +, writes (21 June 2008):

scrazy agony auntNo, it won't work.

The age gap is too much and the maturity levels are too different for you two to work out.

And I'm sorry, but I have to question any man in his 20's who wants to be with a 14 year old - I see it as him taking advantage of you. He could go to jail if he slept with you, by the way, you're still not the age of consent.

Go find a nice boy around your own age. In 10,15 years, the age gap won't be as bad. But right now?

I wouldn't suggest you go for him.

Take care

xo

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2008):

I agree with the others. He's just too old for you and the difference is big enough to mess things up. If you were 22 years old and he was 10 or 15 years older like in his 30s then it wouldn't be a big deal. But being 13-15yo is too young for a gap like that.

It's also a bad sign that this relationship is even starting. It's normal that you might want to be with him, but why does he want a girl your age?

It's sort of like if you were 14yo and trying to get into a romantic sexual relationship with a 9yo boy or something. Even if that boy is mature for his age there's still no way it could possibly be enough. There's just no way an age difference like that is gonna be healthy.

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A female reader, lexilou United Kingdom +, writes (21 June 2008):

lexilou agony auntNo it wont work you are not in the same place in your lives right now. You will want different things and it will cause friction.

Is he prepared to wait until you are old enough to have sex, if not he can get into serious trouble

Are you prepared to sit around and wait whilst he goes out to pubs and restaurants where children arent allowed?

Steer clear and find a nice boy around your own age and save the older guys for when you are older too x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2008):

At your age the age gap is to big. In time as you get older it might be less imortant.

I suggest you find yourself a guy not more then a year or two older then yourself.

Do the wise thing and don't get involved with this guy, it will only cause you heartache in the near future.

Good luck!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2008):

OK miss....

listen...it's against the law and the age difference is too much...

trust me 10 yrs diff is too much....

look at the future....

when you'll be 40 he'll be 50....can you imagine that???

So,I don't think it's a good idea...

Anyway,I'm sure you'll find a better guy than that in the near future...(preferably with lesser age difference)....

Best Of Luck..:)!!!

---your fellow Indian bro..;)

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom +, writes (21 June 2008):

kenny agony auntNormally i would go with age does not matter, that at the end of the day age is only a number, which generaly speaking is true. But as you fall under the legal age of consent that gap between the pair of you becomes gargantuan. Personally i think you are to young to be dating this man at this stage in your life. Wait till you are older, like 16 or 17 then see how you feel then.

Good luck x

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A female reader, crownedprincess United Kingdom +, writes (21 June 2008):

Hiya!!

I'm going to be really honest even if it sounds really

horrible i don't mean it to be!!

Your 14 years old and hes between the age you have given,

DON'T go there!!! what you have to think is why is a guy of

this age interested in a girl as young as yourself!

It is against the law you too to have a sexual relationship

for another 2 years (depending on the legal rules in your

country!) i really really hope that you take my advice!!

good luck!

x

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