A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ladies...how long do you like your guys to last in bed? I'm in my first new sexual relationship in a very long time, and my partner says I have the longest staying power of anyone she's been with. Most partners she was with she did quickies only, because they would last between 20 seconds (!) and maybe a few minutes. I last upwards of 30 minutes before I simply have to cum, but I could last longer. Thing is, I think she is so used to preemies, she grew to like it. She says she likes my stamina, but many times we quit because she is tired or sore. She'll just finish me off orally, which I love, and I will do the same to her, but I can tell she'd love me to cum inside or from sex. But she doesn't have vaginal orgasms at all, so you'd think she would prefer my mouth to my penis after a while.Are there any herbal enhancements or anything to increase sensitivity or make a guy cum faster? I've tried some kind of Male Max or something from GNC, which had Muira PUama (sp?), yohimbe and other stuff in it, but it really only made me cum more...not sooner. I've tried a sample of Levitra from my doc, but that actually made me less sensitive, even though it made me incredibly hard.I know many women would die for a guy like me who loves sex and can go for hours...but I would love it if I could cum faster. HELP!
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male
reader, insrchof +, writes (24 June 2010):
 I feel you man. I too can last for up to 2 hours. I have only had one lover who could even keep up. I just got use to not cumming or for the oral finale! I learned that I was over thinking everything. If you concentrate on every little sensation and feel every tingle in her body, you'll learn to climax at the same time. I am very visual, so it helps to watch yourself pushing into your lover and pulling out. How her nipples are erect or the goose bumps on her legs. Watching her facial expressions or listening to her love sounds. Feel her hands on your body. Sense when she's going to climax and wait for the second one. Sometimes woman can climax and it was a prequel to the sequel. It takes time, but if you really want it, forget about thinking of ways to pleasure her or what she may be thinking, and simply lose yourself in her.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2010): Just give him a nice sloppy bj...:D
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2010): Thanks everyone. Lulu...yes, I'm circumcised, but I don't think this matters, as I had very rapid orgasms with my ex if I wanted to. But I was with her for over 20 years, so I got very used to knowing what to do if I wanted to cum. This girl is different, so it takes longer. I think it's called "situational retarded ejaculation". Funny thing is, if we stop having sex, and she gives me oral, I can cum in just minutes or even seconds...which is usually what happens. From what I've gathered, without being unusually creepy about asking for details, she seems to have had guys who fuck her for maybe 5 minutes, pull out and cum in her mouth. I think she would like me to do this, but it just doesnt happen. We just mix it up, her giving me oral and me giving her, partway during sex...so far its great, but I would like to cum faster sometimes...probably as I get used to her more I will be able to, like I could with my ex. I think the age thing has a little to do with it, bit not much.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2010): My boyfriend can last for the better half of 90 minutes. Sometimes it gets tiring, but if you keep switching positions and she flexes her inner muscles it can go faster or be more enjoyable. i dont really complain about his duration, but if i get turned off by how long it takes he either stops and we do something else or he uses his fingers while staying inside. The most important thing is that she stays wet. if she lacks lubrication then stop and grab some more. Without something to ease the friction she will become sore much sooner and you can even cause her to bleed.
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A
male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (18 June 2010):
 Lol, you must be a porn star! But most men around your age last that long anyway. She must be pullin your third leg mate. Or she just had a run of bad luck with those other blokes. Statistically speaking it gets harder and longer as you get older untill one day you could disapoint the girl because you won't be able to get it up anymore. Hopfully that wont happen to ya!
It's normal mate, congratulations your not so special after all. But you obviously are to her.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2010): A 'natural' remedy would be to do the oral stuff first, and stop when you feel really really close and THEN have sex, and see if that works? Just prolong your foreplay so that when you have sex you're closer than you usually are?
Don't feel like you have a PROBLEM though, because you're definitely on the lucky side of the coin. In time she will grow used to it, and sometimes you could have a lot of sex and sometimes you could go for a 'quickie' because variation is really gud.
As for why she'd want you to cum inside of her instead of wanting to finish off orally.. there's a big sense of intimacy when a guy 'finishes' inside of his girlfriend and a lot of women like it this way, but a lot of women can live without it too.
Don't stress over it too much and make sure you talk about your concerns!
O you could also try Durex Tingle Condoms (though some people can have bad reactions to this, so if anything irritates everything should stop), which i know would seem weird because condoms make it less sensitive.. but the tingle sensations is supposed to be irresistible (or so my boyfriend says.) I think you mite be able to get tingle lube in a sachet form actually? so you could use that instead of the condom?
Obviously if you're using a condom the easiest way to make everything more sensitive is by not wearing a condom (of course only if you're both completely clean and she's on a really effective alternative birth control), or by wearing a featherlite condom but i didn't get the sense that you were using them.
You could also try stopping midway through sex (if you're not using a condom this is more effective) and have a bit MORE 'fore'play, and have her perform more oral or manually stimulate you so that she can have a break and let herself recover for a short while, at the same time still stimulating you until she's ready to return to the act?
I'm sorry this is so long. I hope it helped at least a little!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2010): can i ask if you are circumsized or not? this de-sensitizes a man. If she doesn't have vaginal orgasms you should try clitoral stimulation at the same time - if you're adventerous maybe even go for what ann summers call "the bullet" its a small unobtrusive vibrator that is to be used on the clitorus. As to the question of stamina - thats always good but maybe not in this case - maybe she should give you oral or a hand job before having sex to get you as excited as she is?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2010): I too suffered from what you describe. It is referred to as "delayed ejaculation". Read about it online. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delayed_ejaculation
There can be many causes. My situation used to be much worse to the point where organism seemed almost impossible. Over the years it has subsided and I can usually orgasm within 10 minutes, but there is certainly no "quickies" in my life. Like my wife says, be careful of what you wish for.
Don't stress about it and just enjoy yourself.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2010): with my ex It depended on how i felt at the time. Sometimes it was nice tht it lasted a long time. mostly actually. In fact the only time it was possibly a problem is that i couldnt do oral long enough !!! it took that long !
but other than that I enjoyed it lasting a long time so i cant help really, as it doesnt sound like you have thsat problem ;)
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