A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my boyfriend for almost 5 years. We were planning on getting married and having kids, etc. He is a great guy, and he loves me a lot. I love him to, but I think no more as a friend. He is just too passive.And don't say I should have left before, because I do love him. But when we started dating he was 16! I thought he would become less passive with age and maturity. But here I am.I'm trying to decide whether to leave and try to find someone else... Or to stay and not have to hurt him. This seems like the right thing to do, I can fall back into place with him, and just try not to think about his flaws. But if I move on, I risk being alone forever, and hurting him...
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2008): You have to get out. You are with this guy for the wrong reasons. You cannot stay in this relationship because you are scared of being alone. NO, that is not a good enough reason and it will not last. Be realistic and be fair to this guy. Get out.
You have lots of chances and opportunity to meet someone with whom you will share a loving bond.
A
female
reader, for_a_reason  +, writes (24 October 2008):
 You need to think of this way. If you stay with this guy you'll be lying not only to him, but to yourself as well. You'll be risking your own happiness for sake of not hurting him - in my circumstances this is a good choice, but not when love's involved.
You need to be brave and tell him the truth. I'm sure he'd hate it if you stayed with him just to make him happy - it wouldn't be a relationship.
Don't worry about it so much. You're still very young and the risk of you being alone forever is incredibly slim!
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