A
female
age
36-40,
*sabella1987
writes:Hi everybody. I am broken hearted girl now. I just broke up with my boyfriend for 3 days. I used to live with him and now I broke up with him and I moved back to my parents' house. My life is kind of mess now. I have no car, no job, no money. My parents are too much controlling. That's why I left home and I met this guy and live together. We broke up because a lot of things going on me and him between and can't communicate. How can I stay in my parents house in peace. Especially with my dad. he's so annoying. I can't go back to my bf anymore too. He mad at me, look like he hate me. And he told me if I want to comeback to him I have to listen to him and whatever he say I have to do it. I think I can't do it, because me and him are completely different. How can I move on with no car, no job??? When can I meet new love? Do you guys think I gonna meet someone who love me so much and be together forever with no problem. He is my first love.So, please help me..
View related questions:
broke up, money, move on Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2009): Hi
Hey. listen to Old Guy! He is talking a lot of sense. And, until you don't stand on your own two feet, you will have to keep taking orders from father, boyfriend, husband, son, etc. So, really, get a job. It will give you some respect and a little direction which you need. A man is not a meal ticket and are you planning on living your whole life as someone's girl and not earning a cent of your own? Mary Wollstonecraft proclaimed that marriage was nothing more than legalized prostitution, what do you think living off a boyfriend should be called?
I am sorry for being so harsh, but, if you don't stand on your own and gain some financial independence and respect, you will never be able to be a true adult. Maybe that is why your dad is so controlling, because he thinks that you can't handle yourself out in the world! And, really, you did come back to live under his home, his protection, you have to bear with this. But, you can gain some respect by getting a job, saving some money and moving out.
Best of Luck
A
male
reader, Candleman +, writes (14 October 2009):
 Love happens on its own. It's virtually impossible to predict, can happen when you least expect it and is never guaranteed.
Your biggest problem right now is to get your life in order so that you can become more independent and not have to rely on your parents or a bf in order to provide security for yourself.
In the town I was living before, I met this young girl named "". She was fighting w/ her bf and working a pretty crappy job. He had a good job and treated her bad. She had a learning disability but she was good w/ her hands and she had a good enough general intelligence.
I informed her about government money people can get in order to go to school. Now since she did have a learning disability, college really wasn't an option. Since she was good w/ her hands, I convinced her to enroll in a beauty school.
She looked into financing and was able to get the entire amount of her schooling funded by the state. Now she has a better paying job and doesn't fear so much of losing her bf which basically means she doesn't take as much shit from him. She knows that if it doesn't work out, then she can take care of herself just fine.
This girl's story could be your story. There is a lot of government money that you can get. If you don't have a high school diploma, then your GED is the first step. After that there are many trade schools that you can learn to become a variety of different things. If you are good at school, you can go to college. However, at this point in your life, it seems that a trade school is your better option. You can get a degree/certificate faster (as little as 1 year) and this time next year be working in your new job.
You say you don't have a car. Is there a bus route? There has to be somebody in your life that can take you to school? Go an hour or two early if you have to. Once you get to the school, you can always have someone take you back home.
If you don't want to go to school, then you will have to find a job that is close to someone that does have a car and works the same hours. Get a ride from them and save your money to buy a car. You can even do this for a part time job and go to school at the same time.
Where there is a will, there is a way. You just need to find that way.
As far as lost love. It takes time to get over a heart break. The amount of time depends on how much you really loved that person. There is no set time frame in getting over another. Some people can move on faster, others take years or never completely get over someone.
One important thing for people is to get on with their life. Find things to distract the thoughts of the loss.
Will you meet someone else. I'm sure you will. If you can't find someone in your everyday life then there are dating sites you can meet people on the internet. I found my wife this way.
You're young and you have a lot of years in front of you. You'll be fine.
Best Wishes
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2009): Sounds like you need to stand on your own two feet. Get a job for starters, and save every cent you can. Since you hate living with your parents so much, that should be a very strong incentive to work hard and save money. When you have enough saved, rent an apartment and start a life on your own. Meeting a new love will take care of itself once you're independent and have the self-confidence that goes with it.
...............................
|
