A
female
age
41-50,
*eggina7
writes:So, my boyfriend and I have not been going out for such a long time (three months) and it all went bad lately. Two weeks ago he was not acting like himself. He was irritable and even almost picked a fight with another guy at a bar as he (wrongly) thought he was flirting with me. That night he was overzealous and the condom broke.He freaked out. Wouldn't even touch me in the morning and blamed himself for not being careful. I felt he really didn't want me there so I immediately left and by the door he kissed me and asked me to please not leave the house angry. I have not called him since nor do I plan to. It has been two weeks since he contacted me so I think it is fair to say it is all over between us, which is cool with me. The questions I have a) any ideas as to what went so wrong all of a sudden? b) we hang out at the same bar (we both love friday night DJ - this is where we met). What is the best way to behave so that next time he will not think that I go there hoping to see him because I know he usually there on fridays too, this is my fave bar and I don't want to feel self conscious about going there c) am I under an obligation to tell him that I am not in fact pregnant as he dreaded?What is the best way to handle this?
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female
reader, Reggina7 +, writes (11 April 2010):
Reggina7 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you very much for answering QueenMarmite. You did help. The way I see it I am not the one who ended it (I would have been willing to talk) but after someone behaves badly (I haven't put details cause I didn't want the post to be too long but I felt like a piece of meat rather than a girlfriend) they should call and he hasn't. I agree with you breaking up like that sucks, feels like kindergarden. The guy is very difficult, extremely shy and not a great communicator so it is possible that he has some unrelated problem too but sadly that doesn't change the way he behaved that night and morning. I also wanted to make a clarification, just in case (not for you, you obviously know what I meant) that it is not like I intent to not reveal that I am not pregnant or anything but I was asking whether I am under any obligation to initiate contact and tell him. Guess I am paranoid that I may come off as desperate and wanting him back, which I am not. I am not into being treated like that.
Once again thanks :-)
A
female
reader, QueenMarmite96 +, writes (10 April 2010):
Well,he could have been going through a rough stage.. that he wanted to keep private or something like that, family problems or men problems. But breaking up like that seems like no way to handle it to be honest, unless you feel the relationship wasnt going anywhere anyway. So you hang out at the same bar?! Dont let this stop you... get the girls together, friends.. and head out for a night on the town. At the club, knock a couple of drinks back, be confident and most of all HAVE FUN! Try not to even look at him at first, show your happy/having fun with friends. BUT, dont be arrogant or stubborn.. if he wants to talk, go with the flow. Yes, you should tell him. Go around to his house, or ask to meet somewhere.. sit him down and let him know your not pregnant and everyone makes mistakes, you just learn to be more careful next time! I really do hope I have helped, and all the best... let me know how everything goes, i'd love to know and always here to help :) x
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