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anonymous
writes: Is it normal to fall for your ex-boyfriend's dad? When I started going out with Oliver, I thought he was a great guy and I was attracted to him. But during our relationship, I started to have serious thoughts about his dad (which were not of a sexual nature), nonetheless quite disturbing. I lost interest in Oliver, except in a physical sense and began to devise different ways to allure Adrian, his father,instead. After me and Oliver broke up, it didn't hurt so much as I'd expected and a bit later I started to seriously fantasize about Adrian. Is it wrong?
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2005): Hell yes it's wrong!! Adrian is most likely to be old enough to be your dad!!!!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2005): Yep I reckon it's perfectly normal..... The ex's dad is just like the ex but with all those extra qualities that you wish you had. I would never suggest a relationship with Oliver's dad but there's no harm in fantasising (just make sure no one finds out).
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (2 May 2005):
 Is it "normal"? Well, no. Is it socially acceptable? That depends on the answers to a lot of questions. Are there many years between you and Adrian? Is he aware of/did he foster your attraction to him? Is he single? And how would Oliver feel about it (since you can't avoid seeing him if you're involved with his dad)?It isn't really unusual for younger women to be attracted to the success and maturity of older men, but this particular scenario doesn't sound all that promising. Although Adrian would probably feel flattered that you find him attractive company, it would be inexpressibly awkward for Oliver to have his ex-girlfriend dating his dad. You have to at least consider Oliver's feelings.I'd urge you to give this a lot of thought before you work out other ways to "allure" Adrian, and ask yourself why you're doing it. One question you should ask is "What is it that I want long-term and why is it that I think Adrian can give it?" Good luck with this.
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