A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: i have been with my boyfriend whos 42 for a few years now but he wont come over to take me out unless sex is involved. i just want to go out for a walk together but he wont come over unless i stay somewhere with him the night. i feel like this is wrong if he truly loves me he would want to go out no matter what we do.today he went out for a walk with his brother instead when i wanted to go out with him for a walk but just because i am on my period he wont
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2021): Show this clown the door.
Tell him to go find himself a new fuck toy. You refuse to lower yourself any longer. Then find yourself a REAL MAN.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2021): You've allowed him to make sex his only reason to see you. You didn't make it clear to him in the years past to present; that you are in a give-and-take romantic-relationship. He thinks you're friends with benefits.
The tone and dynamics of a romantic-relationship are set-upon honor, rules, compromise, and boundaries. Love and affection is the fuel that energizes and sustains your emotional-connection. There has to be reciprocity, and fairness. If there is nothing but sex; it's not a relationship. You just get paid in exchange for your services.
Stop giving him sex, and if he refuses to show-up. Dump him, and get a new boyfriend! He's long past his expiration-date.
You're in your 40's. Telling women in their 40's (and over) to dump guys, is a tough call. They'll make excuses for him, or just settle for whatever mess he dumps on them. A good number of mature-women fear their age will limit their choices and opportunities with men. Experience and sophistication makes your taste more selective; and you shouldn't be so desperate for a man at any age. If you put-up with a guy for fear he's irreplaceable, and he knows it; you're stuck with a loser, who'll routinely break your heart. He's so conditioned to your submission and clinginess; he's emboldened to do just about anything, and he'll feel absolutely no guilt or remorse.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2021): I am so sorry you are going through this. For the past 20 years, the men I have dated have behaved this way I am middle aged, just so we are clear on this. These are not young 20 or 30 year old men. These are middle aged, single men who seem to only focus on one thing.
This man is a user. He is sponging off of you and mopping up his sexual needs and draining the life out of her heart, but what is he giving to you? My guess is that this relationship revolves around him and his sexual needs, and your own needs are neglected [I do not mean sexual.]
If he cannot see you unless sex is involved, he is waving all the red flags his tiny little hands can hold. You deserve better than this.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (24 May 2021):
 So maybe it's time to dump the chump?
He wouldn't come to go for a walk because you are on your period and thus sex is off the table? What the actual F!
Seems like you are NOT his GF, you are his blow-up doll and worse he seems to think that he is OWED sex if he takes you out or spends time with you. GROSS attitude.
What are YOU getting out of this relationship?
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (24 May 2021):
 Has he been only wanting you for sex for the whole time you have been together?.
If you feel like this is all he wants and other areas of your relationship are not progressing then i do wonder why you keep him around.
If he went for a walk with his brother and not you because you are on your period, then i would say he is a selfish man who sadly only wants to see you for one thing.
I think that you deserve better than to be treated like this.
I think that maybe you need to ask yourself if this relationship is really for you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2021): my dear friend : you have the answer yourself. you are nothing but his sexual relief. he doesnt have any kind of feeling besides that you are the person who he has sex with. if you are expecting something else, move on. this is the wrong person.
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